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Some People Are Blessed (standard:horror, 1949 words) | |||
Author: Alpha43 | Added: Apr 17 2005 | Views/Reads: 3555/2348 | Story vote: 0.00 (0 votes) |
Every Village has one, and Buck Plummer is Kalkaska's Village Idiot. He is also the unluckiest and most misunderstood person for miles around, but he has a plan... | |||
Some People Are Blessed Some people are blessed. These people can cross the street directly in front of a bus and not get hit. At the same time, the breeze from the near miss will lay their hair back in place, and float up a ten-dollar bill that some poor soul lost. The ‘Silver Spoon’ crowd. They never misspeak, they always look professional, and good luck is a way of life. Buck Plummer is NOT one of those people. When you hear the name Buck Plummer, you begin to smile. There is no doubt that the next words you hear will bring tears from laughter. There are more jokes and stories about Buck than any other citizen of Kalkaska County. Buck tried hard and swore he would make it someday, but.... Buck is one of the most-unlucky people you could ever run into. He has had the misfortune to create numerous enemies as a result of his pathetic misadventures. But even his many enemies can’t help but feel sorry for Buck. Nobody deserves the non-stop catastrophes that were bestowed on Buck Plummer. We have all heard about the flea bitten, one-eared mangy dog with three legs, no teeth, one eye, and a broken tail who is call “Lucky”; that was Buck. He tried, and the more he tried, the more trouble he created. He was not a bad person, but everything he attempted turned to crap. Two steps forward results in three steps back. If it weren’t for bad luck, Buck would have no luck at all. This is the last bad luck story about Buck; it’s the last of Buck period. He was giving up on his hometown of Kalkaska. He was striking out for Las Vegas to earn his fame and fortune, start over, and set the direction for the rest of his life. He did. About two months ago, Buck had just finished sixty days in the county jail for writing checks that bounced, and found that his old job at Gene’s Auto Parts, scrapping out cars, had been filled by Bucks arch-enemy, Jimmy Tuffs. Buck went to get his final paycheck and he found out that Gene had not only withheld his wages, but claimed Buck still owed him another hundred dollars in payday advances. Gene had sold all of Buck’s tools and his torch set, just to make restitution on the rubber checks. Buck asked for a personal loan from Gene, and then had to endure a laughing and choking spell that brought tears to Gene’s eyes. Walking back from the junkyard, Buck was picked up again and hauled back to jail on a claim that Buck had stolen another inmate’s socks. He got two days. This County charges inmates $17.00 a day for upkeep and this upped Buck’s County restitution payment to $1,367.00. Buck walked out of jail this time owing more money, with no job, and no socks. Once out of jail, Buck stopped by the Kal-Ho Bar, just to get warm, and ran into Freddie Steiner playing pool. Fred reminded Buck that he owed him fifty bucks and when Buck told Fred that he remembered no such debt. Freddie cracked Buck with a pool cue and when Buck woke up, he owed the Health Center $87.50 for stitches. Just another ho-hum day for Buck. What set Buck thinking about leaving, was his second set of stitches in one day. Buck decided to try for a free meal at the shelter. When he got his tray full of food, he stepped out of his left shoe (no socks remember), tripped and fell onto a table full of migrant cherry pickers, clearing the table of their food and slopping his food into their laps. Six switchblades snapped open in unison. Doctor Bernard told Buck that two trips per night was the limit at the Health Center, he had his quota for tonight, do not come back. Doc added the cost of twenty-eight stitches to Buck’s rear end to the earlier seven stitches to his skull. Buck had a fairly quiet night after that, until Ferm Waltz whizzed on Buck’s shoulder while Buck was sleeping behind the Fireball Tavern’s dumpster. The events of this day were really no worse than most days, but Buck had made up his mind that there must be a better way of life. Las Vegas was his destiny. Click here to read the rest of this story (123 more lines)
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