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Some People Are Blessed (standard:horror, 1949 words) | |||
Author: Alpha43 | Added: Apr 17 2005 | Views/Reads: 3556/2348 | Story vote: 0.00 (0 votes) |
Every Village has one, and Buck Plummer is Kalkaska's Village Idiot. He is also the unluckiest and most misunderstood person for miles around, but he has a plan... | |||
Click here to read the first 75 lines of the story Liquidating his assets took all of ten minute by making an all or nothing sell off to Mike Deitter at the Ace Hardware. Forty-seven dollars in cash and Mike threw in an ‘Ace Hardware’ duffel bag. Buck felt a little foolish when he realized he didn’t have anything to put in the duffel bag except three left-hand jersey gloves and his military key chain can opener. Several chapters could be written about the events surrounding Buck’s travels, but the best thing that happened was a ride in the mail truck from Kalkaska to Grand Rapids. The worst thing that happened was that by the time he got to Chicago, Buck had been rolled, was broke, and he needed a few more stitches. He had also been relieved of his duffel bag, but that left both hands free to hitch-hike. Buck always tried to think positive. Eventually, Buck did make it to Las Vegas, and being a natural at begging, he survived quite well at panhandling. Buck had a plan and panhandling was only the first rung of the ladder to success. He began to think that this relocation was the smartest thing he had ever done; things were turning around for him. This was a money town; cast off clothing, shoes, and pawnshops were everywhere. Buck never achieved any great success, but he was able to stay clear of the law and eventually lost that look of a hobo. Soon Buck made some friends. He and a crony devised a scam where Buck’s pal would harass tourists that wandered into the seedier part of the strip. Buck would rush up and chase off the potential assailant, acting the perfect gentleman, directing the visitors to a safer part of town. This usually resulted in a sizable tip or reward. Goldmine; like taking candy from a baby. Thumbs up. Life was good and he seldom thought about the ill-fated days back in Michigan. He could even joke about his former bad luck. Like the time he was on trial for assault and battery, with Buck claiming he had merely defended the honor of one of the ‘girls’ that hung out at the Kal-Ho Bar. When Buck identified the lady of the evening, and she turned out to be Judge Davenport’s sister, Buck was given an additional ninety days, added to the sixty days for the assault. Those ‘Bad Luck’ days were gone, he was on his way to making it big! Buck had no understanding of the wagering odds on the gaming tables, and he had no desire to play. Buck did understand the principles of the slot machines (what’s not to understand), and after every successful evening of his tourist scamming, he would celebrate at the “Lucky Seven”. He would get their four dollar buffet (didn’t need to tip), and on the way out he would drop one dollar into the progressive “Big Mama” slot machine. One evening Buck had eaten all the macaroni and cheese, hot wings, and soft ice cream he could hold and as he ambled out to the Lucky Seven lobby, he dropped a dollar coin into his favorite slot machine and pulled the handle. The handle went down and stayed down. Buck pushed up, pulled down, yanked and still the handle stayed in the down position. He had just turned to get an attendant when the handle flew up, the wheels turned, and turned and seemed to be stuck in the rotation mode. Then finally clunk, Blue Diamond, ... clunk, Blue Diamond, and slowly the third wheel stopped, clunk ... Blue Diamond. Lights lit up, bells rang, a screech emitted from the machine. A mechanical voice was droning “BIG MAMA.” People turned to look; the machine rattled and dollar coins started filling the return tray at the bottom of the machine. Coins poured out. More “BIG MAMA.” Buck grabbed a large cup and it was full in seconds. He grabbed another, and another. He had heaping cups stacked everywhere. People were yelling, there was a large crowd, the cups were running over, the machine still rattled, a siren started blaring out of the machine, more lights flashed, more “BIG MAMA.” He couldn’t find any more cups, he yelled for an attendant. Coins were rolling on the floor; people were grabbing his coins. Somebody grabbed a full cup, Buck turned to stop him and two more cups were gone. The guy with the cups tripped and people dived for the loose coins, and then they were picking up the coins at the base of the winning machine. Buck was pushed back and he tripped over an old lady who was on all fours behind him. He shouted at the crowd, but he was just another scream out of hundreds. More “BIG MAMA.” He tried to get up but somebody stepped on his face. He rolled onto his stomach, getting his feet under him, just to have a large lady land in the middle of his back. That was the cause of the first wet spot in his underwear. Buck couldn’t breath; he had the wind, and a couple other things knocked out of him. He heard the bones break in his left hand as some guy tried to stomp a rolling coin. Buck was able to get enough air to scream when somebody crushed his ankle. Buck thought he smelled smoke. He was in severe pain. The crowd was shaking the machine, but it still spit out coins even faster. A computerized voice was monotoning, “Million Dollar Winner” He was able to roll on his right side just in time to get kicked in the crotch. Buck smelled an obnoxious odor shortly after the second kick to his solar plexus. Another wet spot in his shorts. The machine was declaring “Million Dollar Big Mama!” Some mammoth was crushing Buck’s watchband into his wrist. People were rocking the machine. Coins were hitting Buck in the head. He pushed a foot off his chest and looked up in time to see the slot machine slowly falling towards him. Buck thought about James Cagney, standing on those burning refinery tanks in the movie ‘White Heat’ yelling, “Look Ma, I’m on top of the world!” Buck thought about the good times; his childhood, his mother, the old weekend job sweeping out the ‘Fireball Lounge’ and all that free booze. Buck thought that he had finally made it, and made it big time! He could hear an even louder “Million Dollar Big Mama!” Buck thought about Agnes, the jailer, who always gave him a pair of socks at Christmas and extra turkey slices if he was a guest of the County during a Holiday. Buck was really feeling the pain now from at least six broken bones. Buck thought it was possible that he was having a turn of bad luck at this very instant. He was too dizzy to try to get up. Buck thought he saw an ‘Ace Hardware’ duffel bag in the grip of an old lady, full of his dollar coins. Buck thought the slot machine was smiling at him as it ever so slowly got closer. The Casino paid to ship Buck’s body back to Michigan and he is planted at the Lodi Cemetery. The stone says “Buck Plumber” (misspelled), followed by, “Here lays the Lucky Big Winner!” Tweet
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