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The Monster Mash (standard:humor, 1003 words)
Author: Reid LaurenceAdded: Jul 30 2013Views/Reads: 2647/1786Story vote: 0.00 (0 votes)
In an era of great new medical advancement, a doctor has created a whole new race of people...
 



“I was working in the lab late one night When my eyes beheld an eerie
sight For my monster from his slab began to rise And suddenly to my 
surprise 

He did the mash...” 

“Reid, Reid, always good to see you. Have you had a chance to look
around? What do you think?” 

“I think it's great. You've got a really swinging party going on. The
dancing is great and I love the old music. Nice touch.” 

“But that still doesn't answer my question,” said Dr. Lorin Berland,
head of anatomy and physiology at the local university. “What I really 
want to know is, what do you think of them?” 

“Ah, them,” I said uneasily. Glancing around shyly. “They're great,” I
added as quickly as I could, but with a note of hesitation in my voice. 
“Just great. A real modern marvel.” 

“Is that all? After all the work I've done? All the long hours I
dedicated myself to,” he went on to explain, mood rising like a tea 
kettle about to boil over. “Is that all you have to say?” 

“Well...” I stumbled to explain. “I haven't even talked to one yet. Give
me a chance won't you?” 

“They are just plain, old folks Reid. C'mon, don't be shy. I'll
introduce you.” And before I could politely bow out of the invitation 
to meet one of Dr. Berland's guests, I found myself standing in front 
of one of the largest men I've ever seen. Standing at least seven feet 
in height, with about a fifty inch chest, all I could do was nervously 
stare upward and meekly say, “hi. My name is Reid. I understand you're 
one of the guests here. Nice party isn't it?” 

“You needn't be so coy,” said the huge tower of stitched together odds
and ends... a laboratory creation of the distinguished Dr. Berland. 

“There is a question on my mind,” I followed up with. As long as I felt
I'd been given a green light to ask away. 

“What's on your mind little friend,” replied the monster before me, who
I could tell was actually trying to set me at ease. 

“Is everyone here... you know, the same?” I asked. 

“We're all just plain folks here buddy, trying to have a good time.
What's the problem? Can't you see the obvious?” 

I know you're plain folks, I know that. I can see, but I just had to
know... are you all re... you know, re...” 

“If you're trying to ask me if we're all reanimated,” answered my
monster friend. “The answer  is yes. Does that answer your question? 
And by the way, there is a little something you can do for us if you're 
interested.” 

“Now don't get pedantic Peter,” interjected the good doctor. “We bored
our last house guest also and where did it get us?” 

“I must keep trying,” replied this hulking man, who I would call a
monster for lack of a better term. “What we want... what we chiefly 
need, are equal rights and a flag that will symbolize our quest. I'm 
thinking,” he added, continuing on in a state of deep reflection. “What 
we need is a rainbow flag, because we intend to peacefully march and to 
show the people who we are and what we stand for. We're asking for 
equal rights. For the right to marry each-other; for the right to join 
with someone who is not reanimated and for the right to do as we 
choose, just like anyone else. We shouldn't have to walk into a 
restaurant and get stared at just because we're with someone who hasn't 
been reanimated. Just yesterday, I met a girl who told me my stitches 
are cute, so what's stopping me from asking her out? I'll tell you 
what, it's society that's what.” 

“Well put,” added the doctor. “I couldn't have said it better myself.” 


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