Dead-to-the-World Man Walking (standard:Inspirational stories, 907 words)
Author: Godspenman	Added: Apr 10 2006	Views/Reads: 3884/2	Story vote: 0.00 (0 votes)
One morning this week, I woke up with a black eye. How I got it still baffles me. I have my suspicions, of course, but some things are better left to themselves no matter how lonely they may get.

One morning this week, I woke up with a black eye. How I got it still
baffles me. I have my suspicions, of course, but some things are better 
left to themselves no matter how lonely they may get. 

In getting older, I have realized certain things are changing in my
body. For example, I now find myself walking in my sleep. This is a new 
experience for me and I'm not sure what it means or what I should do 
about it. 

On the positive side, walking in my sleep is about the only exercise I
really get these days, so I should not complain too much. It is nice to 
know at my age some things are still working even if it is when I am 
unconscious. My problem has escalated to the point where I have begun 
wearing sneakers to bed. Of course, I don't wear anything else and when 
I find myself three blocks down the street, my sneakers had better be 
PDF (pretty dashing fast). 

Walking in my sleep is not that bad, except for my mysterious black eye.


Not only am I walking in my sleep, but also my wife has accused me of
talking in my sleep. Actually, in my own defense, talking in my sleep 
is the only time I get a word in edgewise. I guess in the middle of the 
night I'm trying to make up for this lack during the day. 

Lately, I have talked so much in my sleep I wake up a little horse,
which just may explain why I have been eating like one lately. 

Unfortunately, my talking during the night has kept my wife awake so
much; she recently requested I start preaching in my sleep so she can 
get to sleep. 

I used to have trouble falling asleep at night. I tried counting sheep
but their bleating kept me awake. When I lay there wide-awake, I began 
worrying about those sheep. Did someone feed them? And, am I going to 
have to shear all those sheep myself? 

Each night I try to get in 40 winks but by the time I reach number 33 I
lose count and have to start all over again. The older I get the more 
my sleep resembles a salad – well tossed. 

Actually, noises in the night upset me the most. Sleep has a way of
bringing out the noise in our house, from a dripping faucet down the 
hall to a creaking window shutter in the living room. It's amazing how 
intelligent these noises in the night can be. They are quiet until I'm 
just about ready to drift off into la-la-land. 

For example, as far as we know we have no mice in our house. We have
never seen any evidence of such critters in our blessed domicile. Yet, 
in the middle of the night I hear these little critters gnawing the 
wall right by my head. How they know where I sleep and when I go to 
sleep is one of the mysteries of these diminutive night stalkers. 

Through the years, I have tried many things to help me get to sleep at
night. For some reason I have no trouble going to sleep during the 
daytime particularly in the afternoon. I call these “power naps,” the 
Gracious Mistress of the Parsonage has another name for them, which I 
cannot repeat here for obvious reasons, my health being the primary 
one. 

I've tried everything to help me fall asleep at night. Once I placed my
shoes and socks right next to my bed before I go to sleep. Although it 
had its intended effect upon me, it also had an adverse effect upon the 
other occupant of my bed. 

No matter when I go to bed nor how long I have slept, I always need just
one minute more of sleep. Why is it I can hear the drip of a faucet 
down the hall but I can't hear the clanging alarm clock at my head? 
Eventually, when I do full asleep the crack of dawn awakens me. 

My wife, trying to assist me in my nocturnal dilemma, suggested I try
some hot cocoa right before going to sleep. For the most part, it does 
work. My only difficulty with hot cocoa is if I don't drink it quickly 
enough I begin nodding halfway through and spill it on my chest. I can 
assure you it's a real eye opener. 

I am reminded of a verse of scripture that addresses this subject.
David, the Psalmist observes,  "It is vain for you to rise up early, to 
sit up late, to eat the bread of sorrows: for so he giveth his beloved 
sleep" (Psalms 127:2 KJV). 

And then, who could overlook Psalms 121:3-4 (KJV), "He [God] will not
suffer thy foot to be moved: he that keepeth thee will not slumber. 
Behold, he that keepeth Israel shall neither slumber nor sleep." 

Now, back to my black eye. I really have no recollection of how this
happened. My wife has tried explaining it to me by pointing out, most 
correctly, that lately I have been walking in my sleep. No argument 
from me. Then she explained while I was walking in my sleep the other 
night I walked into the bathroom door causing the black eye. 

I'm not in any position to question her, but I noticed she was rubbing
her right fist most tenderly. 


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