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A Simple Story Third Verse (standard:romance, 2817 words) [4/5] show all parts | |||
Author: sickboy | Added: Oct 22 2002 | Views/Reads: 2827/1972 | Part vote: 0.00 (0 votes) |
2 hearts crossed, one was taken... | |||
Click here to read the first 75 lines of the story “Hi.” “Do you er... mind if I sit next to you?” I smiled at him. Smiled. Didn't quite make sense, did it? If I could see myself right now, I think I'd saw a face writing “HIT ME HARD” smirking stupidly right back at me. Fortunately, or unfortunately, (doesn't really matter, does it?) Kay was probably face-illiterate. “So, er... how was your day?” he asked. My day? “I don't know... it hasn't quite... ended... yet.” I was probably looking at him, maybe not, I don't know. “Okay, s...” “Do you like movies?” “Yeah, I guess.” “Ever watch Chung King Express?” And so... it began. I began. At the last page of the most wonderful time in my life, nothing seemed to matter anymore, nothing. So what if he's a total stranger? So what if he just wanted to fuck me and leave? So what if I'm yak-ing like a moron who thinks she knows too much stuff? So what? I talked, like I was in a deep-end movie critic session, with the guy sounding like a subtly careful interviewer and myself sounding like a professional movie-watcher. Can't say I enjoyed it. Can't say I didn't. In the middle of our “discussion” about how stupid was the idea that corny poetry would land you a date, suddenly a flooding sense of déjà vu came over me: it was the same thing we talked about when I first met you at Liam's birthday party... and we talked, oh... we talked about so many, so many things... and I enjoyed... us, so very much. As the train approached the final stop, Kay and I fell into momentary silence. Finally, for the first time after 6 hours, the fact came crashing down to mind: yes... it will all be over tonight. The memories came, with it, the pain. The first time you held my hand, you were shaking a little, your face seemingly struggling to hold yourself together. A tiny drop of sweat was slowly stealing its way down your forehead by your left temple, and your eyes looked at me so deeply with anticipation. “Sue... I... er... I like you, a lot. And er... and I think you're an incredibly special person...” I smiled. We smiled, with my heart filled with nothing but bliss, pure, wonderful bliss that no words could ever describe. You took me far and beyond the top of world, and when your lips took mine, it was like a thousand water falls of honey poured through me, flowing through my every vein, filling up every single inch of my heart with nothing but sweetness far beyond any imagination. But now... that seemed so... distant. For now, all I had were but fleeting dreams followed by empty questions and piercing pain. Why? What... did I do wrong? Was I never... good enough, perhaps? Was I... too much of a bitch, perhaps? Was I...? “Tell me something.” Kay's words screeched through my thoughts and suddenly I realized that I've completely forgotten about him. He gave me a stupid reason to keep me company until you came and I had completely forgotten about him. “What?” Finally, after 30 minutes of “mind-trailing”, you car came cruising down the road and landed right in front of me. You got out of the car, almost shouting at your phone. “HELLO? CAN YOU HEAR ME? HAIYAH, CAN HEAR NOT??” The numbness came again, enhanced by a heart that was suddenly pounding like an overworked locomotive engine; I could hardly look at you in the face, that ever spell-binding gaze from your eyes, the same gaze that would destroy me just as it elevated my life. The questions shifted from why to how. How? How are you going to do it? The “you're-very-nice-but” routine? “Could-we-be-friends”? “Would-it-be-better-if”? “I-think”? Ten billion needles stabbed through my heart, with every single one of them surging excruciating agony that overwhelmed my every sense. When yours lips pecked softly on my cheek, I could feel the giant tidal waves of tears building right under my eye-lids, threatening to burst out at a single touch, a single word, a single move. At the brink of collapsing the fragile dams... “Get in the car.” I ran away. Why did ask Kay? I didn't know. As the Civic sped down the highway, I tried to shut everything off, again. I switch on the radio, letting the sound invade my ears, hoping it would take me away for a moment, for even one moment would seem an eternity. Kay started asking about you, but I've already shut him off till his voice sounded like a muted amplifier. Yet, as always, no matter how far I ran, reality caught up to me... “...and I give up forever to touch you...” It was during Iris that we first kissed, it was Iris that we both felt sad about; it was Iris that became our song for each other, for when we met, we were but 2 souls in agony, me, a fatal crush for you, you a fatal crush for... her, and in some way, we made a pact that we would be there for each other whenever we needed someone. Though you never knew what in fact I felt for you, it was a pact that finally led me to you, a pact that made... us together... “Man, you sound like a girl.” I struggled. I struggled so desperately. But I failed, I crumbled, completely crumbled. “...GODDAMNIT, I HATE THIS SONG!” My own voice echoed in my head, like endless ripples on the surface of a pond. I could almost feel myself about to shake, and I held myself. I held myself back firmly with every ounce of sanity I had left, and kept all the tears at bay with every inch of pain just screaming to get out. “...is there a... place you want me to drop you off?” Kay's place was around the territory which also housed the Atrix Apartments, Lynn's place. There was a playground a minute's drive away from Kay's place, the typical housing estate playground that came with a couple of swings and a slide and a metal-bar-tower. I parked by it, just next to a drain that formed the outer boundaries of the playground, and polluted this place of fun and happiness with every drop of my sorrow. Every second of memory spent with you came flooding back, every second of them cut, like a million frozen steel blade swords stabbing through my heart, spreading their freezing tidal waves of sorrow and agony, overwhelming this waking moment. The barricades holding the waves finally collapsed, the last fragile wall crushed into oblivion, the suppressing defenses completely destroyed. I could feel the tears, first, the drops, then streams, then waterfalls. I could hear my sobs, me, crying, like a baby robbed of her candy, a little girl losing her favorite doll, a lady losing a person she... loved. I cried, how long? I didn't know, I didn't care. By the time I finished, the digital clock on the dashboard was blinking “7:47”. I drew out a cigarette and wound down the car window. Beyond the trees, the sun had already sunken, leaving only a soft shade of blue stretched across the horizon, waiting to be consumed by night's darkness. I had done my running, it was time. I stepped out of the car and found you waiting on the pavement across the road, just as I've waited for the past 5 days. You were wearing a striking red T-shirt with a pair of blue jeans, looking on casually as the cars went by. Maybe I've forgotten to look at you like this, but you were such an attractive person, tall, well-built, stylish, a little boyishness still hiding behind the handsome face of a maturing young man... How could I? How could I possibly let go of... us? How could this charming face be the source of such excruciating pain? You saw me standing across the road, perhaps still too far away to detect my sorrow, you ran up the pedestrian bridge. “What was THAT about?” You were obviously annoyed and agitated by my little escapade. I was looking down all the while, not wanting to meet your eyes that were now infuriated with anger. “Who was that guy? What the fuck were you two do...?” “What's it to you? What... the fuck... is it... to you?” Silence, yet again. Nothing but the winds and cars and the growing wound in my heart. Questions no longer came, logic no longer followed and I had given up completely, consumed by the descending darkness of the night. “You know,” said you. ... “Yeah.” ... “How?” “Liam called.” ... “I'm sorry.” ... “How... long has it been?” “A month.” “Congratulations. I'm sure she's perfect for you.” “Sue, I'm sorry...” “No... don't... touch me.” ... ... “Let me send you back.” It was almost... amusing. At the end of completely destroying me, you offered me the one thing you never deprived me of: a car ride. Perhaps that's all I ever was to you, a girl to temporarily receive your gifts, your kindness, your touch, your care, your... love... the love that was all along meant to be for someone else, someone... better... someone... not me. “Goodbye, Damon. Have a nice life.” The sound of keys clinking sneaked in, followed by the door opening. A girl came in, with a black tight-fitting sleeveless and a pair of dark blue hot pants and reddish hair spilling softly on her shoulders. Her face was hiding behind a layer of overdosed make-up, but her weariness was written all over. “Eh? How come you're here ar?” it was Jo, pointing at Kay still sitting on the stool beside me at the balcony. “Helped Lynn.” “Again ar? Okay. Morning Sue, up so early one?” I smiled at her as she closed and locked the door behind her. “I gotta sleep (yawning) see you later.” “Party all night?” asked Kay. “Yeah.” I suppose the beauty of Lynn's flat-mates was their ability to completely not get involved or participate in each other's matters. Just proves that living together is one thing, being “friends” is another. And besides, once you start caring, everything changes. Everything. I turned back to Kay, not really knowing what we were actually talking about before. Suddenly I noticed the tired eye-bags hanging behind those glasses and a face of weariness staring across the faraway trees, a face that hadn't caught my attention before. He yawned lightly, covering his gaping mouth with a hand. “You were up?” “Yeah.” He answered, turning to me. “Maybe you should go back. Get some sleep.” “Well... I would have if you hadn't wanted me to stay.” “I never asked you to.” I said, looking at him, with my voice as flat as a broken harmonica. I wasn't annoyed, far from agitated, perhaps it would be better if I was. My emotions right now were just plain calm, not a tiny ripple nor a sound. A minor headache crept at the back of my skull with my mind a static screen without any intentions of flooding itself with any image, not of the past, nor of the present: I had enough. Perhaps Kay had taken my reply as a sign of severe annoyance and disapproval: he suddenly fell quiet, returning his gaze to the faraway trees. “Sorry.” He said finally. “For what?” “For... being an asshole who tries too hard.” He turned at me and smiled a little, displaying a sense of helplessness. It was then that I saw it. It was in his eyes, cowering behind those plastic spectacles, a blend of mild sorrow mixed with a touch of... worry. Just right then, it all just seemed so unbelievably obvious yet so insensibly unreal: he was worried... he was worried about... me. “You can be... extremely... irritating in a way that... doesn't make sense, you know that?” Irritating, I didn't think that would be the exact word to describe it. I suppose it was an uneasiness of this entire situation that seemed so... fabricated, how could a stranger display such... honesty of... caring? “Well, thank you (smiling); I'll take that as a compliment.” I looked at him, and it actually happened... I was... grinning, uncertain if I was annoyed or irritated or... amazed? Then I realized it was the same unexplained, uncertain uneasiness when I first met Kay... “...yeah, but it's not an interrogation...” “...student, designer and singer wannabe...” “...he created something else, called hope.” ... “Anyway, enough of my crap, I need to get some sleep.” He stood up; grabbing the backpack that looked like it'd been through a war and walked towards the door. Halfway through those 2 metres, he turned at me. “You sure you don't want breakfast?” “Yeah (smiled), I'm fine.” “Okay.” He grabbed the keys hanging on a nail on the wall next to the door. “Get a pill from the kitchen cabinet; it will er... kill a bit of the headache.” “Okay.” “Bye.” He walked out the doorway, with the door swinging to the closed position when suddenly, a hand pushed it open again, the palm still clutching the doorknob. “Can I ask you something really stupid?” “You can, ‘may you' is the question.” “Are you er... you okay?” -to be continued- Tweet
This is part 4 of a total of 5 parts. | ||
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