A Minister And A Day Off His Rocker (standard:humor, 906 words)
Author: Godspenman	Added: Oct 06 2019	Views/Reads: 1354/1054	Story vote: 0.00 (0 votes)
My advice is to take God up on his marvelous offer, today, not tomorrow.

I was tootling along one day last week, quite focused on getting my
business for the day done. In fact, I was feeling good about the 
progress I was making with my “to-do list.” Nothing is more satisfying 
to me than the sense of being in control of my schedule. I love 
checking off items on my “to-do list.” 

As the scheme of things usually develops with me, this euphoric
situation was not long-lived. It was left to the Gracious Mistress of 
the Parsonage to bring a sense of reality into my life. 

“Haven't you forgotten something?” She asked me. 

This question drove me back to my daily planner. Frantically, I searched
my schedule to see what appointment I had missed or what project I had 
overlooked this time. With all due respect to her, I could not find 
anywhere in my schedule, or on my calendar, where I had missed 
anything. 

“No,” I cautiously said to her. “I seem to have covered everything.”
With that, I flashed a confident smile in her direction. 

She caught that smile and returned a menacing glance in my immediate
direction. I caught her drift, which clearly undermined my previous 
confidence in my schedule. 

“Don't you recall,” my wife almost sneered, “your New Year's
resolution?” 

This sent me into a mild panic. New Year's resolutions, as everybody
except my wife knows, are not to be taken seriously. People make such 
resolutions only because it's the thing to do at the time. What a 
person says on New Year's Eve should have no bearing whatsoever with 
the coming New Year. 

Looking at her with all the seriousness I could muster at the time I
said, “I really don't know what you mean.” 

At the time, I thought she mistook my seriousness for what she likes to
call “my flippancy.” 

“I think you know exactly what I mean,” she demanded. 

Seeing the blank expression on my face, or more blank than usual, she
began to realize I had no idea what she was talking about. Placing both 
hands on her hips, which is a warning sign to me of something ominous 
to follow, she stated her case. 

“One of your New Year's resolutions was to take a day off each week.
When was the last time you took a day off?” She demanded. 

Then it all started coming back to me. I did remember such a resolution.
But if I recall it accurately, someone, I'll mention no names, backed 
me into a corner forcing me into such a resolution. 

At the time, the resolution was not the result of any serious
contemplation on my part. I thought I was just placating her at the 
time. I never imagined months later she would be calling me on the 
carpet for it. 

“Well,” I stammered, “there was that week in February when I took
several days off.” Then my smile returned to me along with a little bit 
of confidence. 

“You don't mean those days you were sick in bed with a cold, do you?
Tell me you're not including those in the category of days off?” 

My smile along with my confidence deserted me. 

No matter what anybody says, I do sometimes think of taking a day off.
And people should get credit for some of their intentions. 

If, for example, I can't actually take a day off, it should be enough to
think about doing it. The only problem with this pitch is, my wife 
doesn't buy it. Believe me, if she was buying, I would give a good 
discount to her. 


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