Celebration Has Become a Way of Life for Me (standard:humor, 924 words)
Author: Godspenman	Added: Aug 20 2017	Views/Reads: 1857/1313	Story vote: 0.00 (0 votes)
The best celebration that I know of is feasting upon that “living bread” which is none other than Jesus Christ.

I have just celebrated my birthday, my wife's birthday and our wedding
anniversary. I am not sure how old I am or how long we have been 
married and I won't even go to my wife's age. I'm old enough to know 
better. 

I have long past the idea of candles on my birthday cake representing
one candle per year. The fire department will not give us a permit to 
do that. 

Someone asked me how long we have been married and without even
thinking, I said, “Forever.” Once that word danced out of my lips I 
knew I was in trouble with the Gracious Mistress of the Parsonage. One 
look from her, and I knew that my forever had ended. 

All seriousness aside, celebrations are wonderful opportunities, at
least from my point of view, to gorge myself with cake. After all, if 
it is my birthday or anniversary or my wife's birthday, I should be 
respectful enough to eat the cake presented. 

At my age, I'm not too concerned about eating healthy. That's why I love
the holidays. 

Between holidays, my wife insists on eating healthy. I cannot even name
all of the vegetables that appear on our table at suppertime. I think 
they are vegetables, my wife says they are vegetables, but I am not so 
sure about it. My wife believes that if it is green and leafy it must 
be a vegetable. 

I, on the other hand, with a fork in each hand, have had enough
vegetables I want to get to the celebratory cake. After all, what is 
the sense in celebrating a birthday or an anniversary if you cannot eat 
the cake presented? Especially if it is my birthday. 

I will give my wife the latitude to put vegetables, so-called, on our
dinner table between our celebrations. The problem is, my birthday, her 
birthday and our anniversary are within three weeks of each other. That 
means, there are 49 weeks that I have to put up with vegetables. 

Therefore, I am a great one when it comes to celebrating something.
Anything. I am so glad that our culture is assisting me in this. It has 
come to the point where there is a celebration for every day of the 
year. I do not care what I'm celebrating, as long as cake is involved, 
I'm right there. After all, I certainly don't want to offend anybody. 

In my carefulness to not offend anybody in this regard, I have on
occasion offended my wife. She is a vegetableaholic if ever there was 
one. She even eats vegetables as a snack. Once at a church fellowship, 
she brought in a huge plate of raw vegetables, insinuating it was a 
snack tray. 

Recently, I was sitting in my lazy-boy chair, drinking a nice hot cup of
coffee and reflecting on the important issues of life. I cannot tell 
you how many problems in this world I have solved if only somebody 
would listen to me. 

However, in my muse a wonderful thought embraced several grey cells.
What if, and I don't have any legitimate documentation on this, when we 
get to heaven, it is a celebration every day with cake only an angel 
could bake? And what if, every day it was somebody's birthday and we 
needed to celebrate it? That certainly would make heaven for me. 

Further, in my muse, what if there were no vegetables whatsoever to be
found at the Marriage Supper of the Lamb? That too would make heaven, 
heaven for me. What if all we had at that table was cake, pie, ice 
cream and soda pop? Wouldn't that just be divine? 

I think most people, particularly my wife, take this matter of eating
healthy too seriously. I think when a person eats it should be an 
enjoyable experience and not a ragged old duty. 

I wonder what kind of soda pop they will have in heaven? I'm sure it
will not be a diet soda. Why would we be dieting in heaven? 

What if, and again, I am speculating, everyone in heaven is fat?
Everyone is fat, eating, laughing and enjoying themselves. Wouldn't 


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