Click here for nice stories main menu

main menu   |   standard categories   |   authors   |   new stories   |   search   |   links   |   settings   |   author tools


I May Be Odd but One Day I’ll Get Even (standard:humor, 907 words)
Author: GodspenmanAdded: May 24 2015Views/Reads: 2205/2Story vote: 0.00 (0 votes)
I may appear to be “acting odd,” but I am really simply just odd. I think I can rightly say that I am the “Wizard of Odd.”
 



I must admit that I am not a great one in answering questions. It may be
I do not hear the question correctly, or someone will ask me a question 
and I give an answer to another question. 

I am beginning to think that I have a little bit of politician-itis. I
hope there is a cure for this. I would hate to go through the rest of 
my life inflicted with this malady. I promise you, I am not running for 
any political office, and therefore I do not need any politician-itis 
to infect my personality. 

Overall, questions are very hard to answer. If you miss one word in the
question, in your mind you hear a different question. I must confess 
that I do not always listen as carefully as I should. Usually I am 
thinking of something else when somebody presents their question to me. 


By somebody, I am referencing the Gracious Mistress of the Parsonage. I
noticed a game show on television now called, “500 Questions.” I had to 
laugh when I saw it because my wife has them beat by a long shot. Why, 
she can give me 500 questions before breakfast. 

It is my opinion that one of the secrets to longevity, not to speak of
happiness, in marriage is not taking all of those questions seriously. 
If I had to answer all the questions that came to me in the order they 
came to me, either I would be divorced or in an insane asylum, which 
may be the same place. 

Whoever coined the phrase, “Yes, Dear,” was a genius on many levels.
When I began using this phrase, my life took on a little calmer 
altitude. 

One of the things that I have learned about wives is that they will ask
questions not really expecting answers. When I first got married, I 
thought I had to answer every question that stumbled out of her mouth. 
I still remember the day when it dawned on me that she was asking me 
questions not to get my answer but to have me nod my head and say, 
“Yes, Dear.” Then our marriage took on a very nice direction. 

I am not sure what I was doing at the time, but the question that came
from my spouse, was, “Are you acting odd, or what?” 

Now, according to my spouse, she believes I am an Academy award actor. I
only wish I were as good as she thinks I am in the area of the thespian 
arts. I simply am not. 

To her question, “Are you acting odd, or what?” I simply replied by
saying, “I'm not acting!” 

At the time, I did not know what I was saying, but the more I think
about it, the more I think I said the right thing. I am not sure it is 
possible to act odd, although there may be some very good actors that 
can pull it off. With me, I am not acting. 

I am not sure what “acting odd” means from her perspective, but I am
coming to understand my perspective of the whole thing. 

I may appear to be “acting odd,” but I am really simply just odd. I
think I can rightly say that I am the “Wizard of Odd.” 

Being somewhat of an expert in the area of “acting odd,” I have learned
a few things about it. There is nothing wrong with being odd, 
particularly in the society in which we live. 

Sometimes people talk about the “average person in America,” which does
not exist anywhere on the planet. What would the average person look 
like? Where would you begin? 

I know with many people, what I do may look odd. I am not worried about
that. I know my wife thinks some of the things I do is odd. But then, 
she married me. I could not be that odd if she was willing to marry me. 


Everybody is odd in different ways. I'm not sure all the different ways
in which I am odd, but the more I look into myself and the oddness of 
my life, I'm getting a little more comfortable in my skin. I am not 
sure what that means, because I have never been out of my skin that I 
can remember. There were those odd moments when my skin crawled, but 
that's another story. 

Being odd isn't the horrible thing some people think it is. If I were
just like everybody else, how would you know it's me? The thing that 
makes me different from everybody else is that aspect of oddness that 
permeates my personality. 

It is not that I have tried to be odd. I am just trying to be myself. I
see some of these so-called celebrities on TV and everybody wants to be 
like them. I have yet to see anybody on TV I would like to be like. If 
I were like some celebrity, how would you know the difference between 
me and he? 

I have come to like myself and the main reason I have come to that point
is I have discovered how much God loves me. One of my favorite verses 
is, John 3:16, “For God so loved the world, that he gave his only 
begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in him should not perish, but 
have everlasting life.” 

I accept being odd now because one day I will be even. 


   


Authors appreciate feedback!
Please write to the authors to tell them what you liked or didn't like about the story!
Godspenman has 715 active stories on this site.
Profile for Godspenman, incl. all stories
Email: jamessnyder2@att.net

stories in "humor"   |   all stories by "Godspenman"  






Nice Stories @ nicestories.com, support email: nice at nicestories dot com
Powered by StoryEngine v1.00 © 2000-2020 - Artware Internet Consultancy