Click here for nice stories main menu

main menu   |   standard categories   |   authors   |   new stories   |   search   |   links   |   settings   |   author tools


Me Tarzan, you Insane! (standard:humor, 900 words)
Author: GodspenmanAdded: Feb 17 2014Views/Reads: 5139/1596Story vote: 0.00 (0 votes)
Has there ever been a time when there was more chest pounding than today? It is a rare day in May when I get to the point of absolute frustration. These chest pounders do it for me all the time.
 



Has there ever been a time when there was more chest pounding than
today? It is a rare day in May when I get to the point of absolute 
frustration. These chest pounders do it for me all the time. 

I will admit that I do get aggravated at a few things and, to be quite
honest, a few people. 

Aggravation is one thing, but frustration is quite a different thing. In
fact, aggravation probably is good for a person. You can go mellow for 
so long and then you need something this stir up the soul and 
aggravation does it all the time. So, there is something good to be 
said about aggravation. 

On the other hand, I cannot think of anything good to say about being
frustrated. Frustration means have come to the end of something, 
hopefully it is not my rope, and I do not know what to do next. Well, I 
might know what to do next, but it is against the law in every state I 
know. 

Recently, the Gracious Mistress of the Parsonage and I went out to
celebrate Valentine's Day at a local restaurant. We do this 
occasionally just to break the routine and, if you do not tell anybody, 
I like to make fun of other people. 

When I was growing up a lot of people made fun of me. Turnabout is fair
play, I always say. 

We were getting along most famously and enjoying our evening repast when
I happened to overhear the conversation from the table behind us. I am 
not one to eavesdrop, but there are some situations words impossible 
not to eavesdrop. If I want to tell my wife something I do not want 
anybody else to hear, I say it in the car so nobody else can hear. That 
is a rule everybody should understand. 

I remember as a child whenever I got too loud in the house, my mother
would always say, “Use your indoor voice. You're getting too loud.” I 
was about to turn around and tell the people behind us to use their 
indoor voice. Then I heard what they were saying and turned up the 
listening volume. 

“These people who believe in God just make me angry,” the man said to
his companion. “People who believe in God these days must be crazy.” 

I really was tempted to interrupt him at this point but I wanted to hear
what else he had to say. 

“I'm not going to let anybody tell me what to do. I am the master of my
own ship. I'm the captain of my life and what I say goes.” 

I have heard that line many times before. Usually, the people who use
this line of argument are those who believe in evolution and in this 
case, this man probably did come from some monkey somewhere. 

There was a little lull in the conversation and I went back to my dinner
and conversation at our table. Then I heard the guy behind me beat his 
chest and roar again. 

“I am what I am today because of my determination and my strength and my
knowledge. I can do anything I set my heart on. Nobody can get in my 
way.” 

At this point, it was all I could do to keep from laughing and falling
off my chair. My wife was trying to find out what was wrong with me and 
I covertly pointed to the people behind me. She listened for a moment 
and then a smile broke out all across her face. 

Again, there was a lull in the conversation behind us and my wife and I
whispered some sarcastic comments back and forth to each other. No 
matter how down you feel about yourself and how stupid you feel you are 
at times, it is always wonderful to run into someone stupider than 
yourself. That is what life is all about. 

The guy behind me then made another comment. “All this snow up north is
disgusting. When will it ever stop? I've never known it to snow that 
much in any winter in my life.” 


Click here to read the rest of this story (25 more lines)



Authors appreciate feedback!
Please write to the authors to tell them what you liked or didn't like about the story!
Godspenman has 715 active stories on this site.
Profile for Godspenman, incl. all stories
Email: jamessnyder2@att.net

stories in "humor"   |   all stories by "Godspenman"  






Nice Stories @ nicestories.com, support email: nice at nicestories dot com
Powered by StoryEngine v1.00 © 2000-2020 - Artware Internet Consultancy