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Another Coversation Between Squirrels (standard:humor, 913 words) | |||
Author: Rimmer | Added: Oct 03 2008 | Views/Reads: 3168/2001 | Story vote: 0.00 (0 votes) |
Follow up to 'A Conversation Bewteen Squirrels'. | |||
Click here to read the first 75 lines of the story the mystery box please. Double down. Fold. Bluff. I'd like two-thirds of a turnip please... S2: Stop trying to change the subject! You have been listening to talk radio again, and you know the rule. S1: No talk radio, because I have a hard enough time understanding what's happening in the real world. Much less the make believe worlds of the callers. S2: That's a good squirrel. I'm proud of you. Now tell me what the big news is. S1: Do I have to try to understand this world? Those other ones seem to be a lot more fun than ours. There's this one I especially like, were everything is made out of nerf and crème pies. S2: Why do you like that one so much? S1: When they go to war, it's like watching an episode of the Three Stooges on dope. The beautiful part is that no one actually gets hurt. S2: How do they know who won? S1: They have a winner take all round of dodge ball. S2: Really? What program did you hear that one on? No, wait a second. I don't want to know. Will you please try to concentrate for a moment? You stopped me for a reason right? S1: Yes. Yes I did. S2: Now what was that reason again? Before you answer me I want you to take a moment and think very hard about your answer, because if it is not Earth shattering news, I'm going to start stapling. S1: Well I was at the... S2: No. Take a moment and collect your thoughts before answering. There are trees everywhere and my trigger finger is very itchy. S1: Where did that air compressor and staple gun come from? S2: I have them stashed all over the woods for just this sort of occasion. Now what is the huge news? S1: I don't know if I should tell you now. S2: Why not? S1: Well...To be honest...I think you'll hurt me if I do. S2: Oh come on, it's only an industrial staple gun. Look if it makes you nervous I'll put it away. S1: Thank you, that's much better. S2: You're quite welcome. The monumental news now please. S1: Why are you twitching all of a sudden? S2: That's it! Start running cousin! I've got a thousand feet of hose here and I can hit a target at a hundred yards with this staple gun. S1: That hurt! Quit it! Okay, I'm going! I thought you'd be in a better mood after inheriting all that money. S2: Money? No, don't go. Wait up! Have I told you how much taller you look in those heels? Tweet
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