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WHEN THE GODS WERE WALKING THE EARTH, part 2 (standard:humor, 3734 words) [2/2] show all parts | |||
Author: Art by Assiliym | Added: Nov 15 2006 | Views/Reads: 4009/2001 | Part vote: 0.00 (0 votes) |
part 2 of the comedy central of the Greek Gods | |||
WHEN THE GODS WERE WALKING THE EARTH, part 2 By Siromah "So, Hephaestus hurried to the shore. The Isle of Bliss was the favorite place of Poseidon's daughters, and he was hoping to meet one of them. "Sea Horse, Swift as the wind, Come to the shore, Come to my call," he sang passionately. Instantly, Sea Horse appeared from the deep blue sea. She was Poseidon's third and most pampered daughter. Instead of swimming, she rode a sea horse. The princess and her horse were inseparable; they never parted, even for an instant. She saw a god of exceptional beauty standing on the shore, his face veiled. The mermaid immediately fell in love with him and ordered her sea horse to take her to the shore. "Who are you," asked Poseidon's daughter. "No, wait" she exclaimed, "I know who you are! You are the beautiful Apollo! Give me a kiss!" Before Poseidon could stop her she lifted his veil. His turban fell, revealing his goat's horns. "A goat!" the mermaid screamed, stepping back. The god of forge was even more frightened than she was, and he ran desperately back to his carriage. "Oh, this is Hephaestus, the horned god of forge," Poseidon's daughter laughed. "Little snail, little snail, show me your horns!" She liked her joke so much that she fell laughing on the sand and laughed, and laughed, and laughed, until her tail split right in the middle. Exhausted, she jumped on her sea horse's back and headed home to her father Poseidon's palace. This time, Poseidon was really furious. What a day! First his eldest daughter Sea Violet came back with her tail split, two hours later the same happened to her younger sister Sea Star, and now his favourite Sea Horse was back with her tail split! The king of the sea sighed, stapled her tail with four crabs, and called for the new chief security officer. After the poor Octopus had been handed over to the sharks for execution, the old Tortoise had been appointed in his place. Poseidon did exactly as he had promised: he ripped his shell off, cast the Tortoise into boiling water and then fed him to the sharks. "This is what will happen to those who don't care about their jobs," he said. He then called the old Crab, the old dodger. "You are now responsible for my beloved daughters' safety. If you fail, I'll make an ashtray of your shell, and I'll feed you to the sharks!" The Crab shivered; by that time, he had an idea of what would happen to him if Poseidon's youngest daughter, the naughty Dolphin Rider, came back with her tail split. He could not reject the appointment, though, for the angry king of the sea would kill him with his trident. The Crab thus opted for the lesser evil. "Yes, Your Highness. Not a hair on her head shall be touched," the Crab promised and swam off to catch up with the little minx riding her favorite Blue Dolphin. Meanwhile, the lovestruck gods sneaked through the copper-studded gates for the third time. Their wives, however, were on the alert, and noticed their escape. "Those cheaters are trying to get our! Fire!" A lightning shot from Athena's eyes. To her dismay, however, it bounced off Hercules' armour without hurting him. This time Hephaestus had done an excellent job! "Sprinkle embers on their heads, On the cheaters' filthy heads," a little nightingale croaked. "Blessings on you, little Nightingale," Athena exclaimed. "From this day, you shall not croak, you shall sing in an angel's voice!" Indeed, from that day the Nightingale no longer croaked; he sang in a beautiful melodious voice, and was naturally acclaimed the best opera singer among wild birds. Athena hurled a fireball which exploded right over her spouse's head. Hercules hopped about like a singed rooster, for a few embers had slipped under his armour and were burning his skin. Despite his pals' protests he threw off his armour and could scratch until he relieved the itching. He did not have much time for that, though. Hercules was the strongest of the gods; he was the only one who could beat Ares in a wrestling bout, but instead of brains in his head he had bats in the belfry, and they would flip around when the wind blew in through his ears... And when they did, Hercules would do whatever he wanted and not listen to anyone. "Die, traitor," Athena screamed and hurled another fireball. Then she laughed at the sight of her husband hopping and yelping in pain. Flaming sparks showered upon his head, his hair burst into flames, and the lava melted his flesh. In a few seconds, all that was left of him was a pile of ashes and a set of blackened armor. Terrified, the gods rushed back like hares to Hephaestus' smithy. They found him sitting on the bench outside, crying bitter tears. "Sea Horse was scared of my horns and ran away," he wept. "I can never again appear before a woman the way I look! Oh, my heart is full of sorrow! I should better move to the kingdom of Hades! They are all shadows there, and they won't mock me!" "Oh come on," one of the gods interrupted him. "Cut the crap and look Click here to read the rest of this story (238 more lines)
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Art by Assiliym has 6 active stories on this site. Profile for Art by Assiliym , incl. all stories Email: siromah@graffiti.net |