Tough Teacher (standard:Satire, 818 words)
Author: Reid Laurence	Added: Aug 02 2006	Views/Reads: 7668/2	Story vote: 0.00 (0 votes)
If you've ever had to suffer through the type of hard-driving, relentless, classroom monster of a teacher I've described in this story, you'll know exactly what I'm talking about!

“Okay... everyone take out a sheet of graph paper and remember, if you
don't turn this quiz in on the green graph paper I told you to get, you 
get a zero for the day... is that clear? Now then, after I get this on 
the board, you've got exactly fifteen minutes to solve it.” But as the 
decidedly difficult taskmaster turned his back and finally completed 
writing out the question for the class - which was only one of the 
many, daily tortuously difficult quizzes required to pass the term, not 
to mention the weekly tests each student had to endure - one of the 
more timid pupils raised a shaky hand in the air, waiting for Dr. 
Laurence to turn around and discover it. 

“I don't remember Castigliano's Theorem,” remarked the student, as every
eye in the classroom looked on in wonder and pity. “What can I do?” he 
continued, as the teacher, now standing directly in front of him seemed 
to take on more of the appearance of some looming monster, ready to 
strike out at any moment and deal the metaphoric death blow he'd become 
so famous for... the ever present threat of the evil, grade crushing 
‘zero with a dot in its center'. Just the type of thing which had made 
Dr. Laurence so infamously threatening at the school in which he 
taught, or should I say... tortured, for lack of an even more 
justifiable description. 

“And whose fault is that?” answered the teacher on his way to his desk.
Then, opening the top drawer of his shiny metal enamel desk, he removed 
the grade book which concealed to everyone but himself some of the most 
personal and unflattering information one could ever imagine, and 
opened it to its proper page. “I don't mind doing this Jeffery. You've 
been forgetful much too often - more so then the rest of the class and 
good engineers simply don't forget their lessons as easily as you do. 
Do I make myself clear?” “Yes Dr. Laurence, but...” “Good. Well then, 
you get a zero with a point in the center for the day. I trust that 
there will be no more memory lapse in you, and let me make another 
thing perfectly clear... there will be no epidemic of this nature in 
this classroom. I will not tolerate forgetfulness in any of you. And I 
can assure you also, that none of the more wealthy or influential 
fathers you may have will be buying you a grade out of this class. That 
is an insufferable monument to laziness, something else I won't 
tolerate. Now then,” added the fiercely stern teacher, I want to see 
every eye on the board. You've got fifteen minutes. Ready... begin.” 

But even as the teacher announced the beginning of the quiz session, a
knock came at the heavy, fireproof, classroom door and as it opened, it 
revealed a familiar, moderately built man in his early fifties, dressed 
neatly in an all black suit with white shirt and black matching tie, 
asking in a very low, monotone voice if he could have a word with Dr. 
Laurence. Seeing no alternative, the doctor of structural engineering 
turned to his class and interrupted them at their task to inform them 
of his untimely departure, and to announce that there had better be no 
cheating. “If I find that anyone of you has even glanced at another's 
paper, you will all end the day with a failing grade. I hope I have 
made myself clear,” he finished with, as he was accustomed to saying, 
and passed through the threshold of the door, shutting it firmly behind 
himself with a resounding thud. 

“Now then Dr. Laurence, pull up a chair,” muttered the well dressed,
confidently poised man. “I don't expect this to take long.” “I hope 
not,” replied the doctor. “You realize my class is taking a quiz and I 
really should be in the room, watching them.” “Well... that's just the 
thing. That's why I brought you down here to my office.” “Alright, 
let's get to the point then... exactly what is the problem?” “Oh, come 
now doctor, we've had this discussion before, but you still remain 
evasive on the issue. When I hired you, I knew all about your 
background in engineering, but I never dreamed...” “Yes... never 
dreamed what? Please come to the point Dr. Killingsworth. Remember, I 
have a class in session at this very moment taking an important quiz.” 
“But that's it! That's my very point. This is an elementary school! You 
can't expect five year old children to absorb the type of difficult 
material you're trying to teach.” “Hmm, are you sure?” “Yes, for Gods 
sake! I'm sure!” “Alright then, if you really think I'm wrong in this. 
My gut feeling tells me the students will be lost in boredom, but we'll 
just have to back up to plain calculus.”


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