All I Ever Wanted to be Was A Fireman (standard:Psychological fiction, 1239 words)
Author: Spotlight	Added: Feb 06 2004	Views/Reads: 3774/2302	Story vote: 0.00 (0 votes)
Disillusioned and Obsessed. Fire and Death. A short short about repressed feelings. A witty drama, Mike calls it. Dark humor.

All I Ever Wanted to be was a Fireman 

All I ever wanted to be was a fireman.  I am a fireman.  I have not
always been a fireman. 

The fireman said, “So, all you want to be is a fireman?” 

I said, “All I ever wanted to be is a fireman.” 

“Firemen go to school and work hard and go to college for eight years
and get a professional degree in business management.”  My dad said. 

The fireman said, “Of course.” 

I worked real hard to become a fireman.  I rode my bicycle to school,
because firemen are strong and have muscles and I always wanted to be a 
fireman.  My legs burned like fireman's houses they put out.  I made a 
fireman's hat in Kindergarten out of red brick blocks and crayons and 
teacher made me an official class fireman for the day and I was happy.  
I burned the rest of the blocks and put them out with a musical fireman 
plastic hammer my size.  My mommy had to buy new blocks and she told me 
I would get to go to a new fireman training special school, but firemen 
don't make fires. 

I said, “Firemen put out fires and I want to be a fireman.” 

She said, “Firemen, who are good firemen, wait patiently for fires to
put out and raise families in safe fireproof houses and have a job that 
pays more then nothing.” 

I wanted to be a fireman, so I worked real hard and said I need a
business degree.  I put out the stove one night and my butt was on fire 
for two days after.  I knew firemen were tough and strong, so I didn't 
cry and practiced spraying water with the garden hose. 

Firemen don't need friends, I found out. 

“I don't want to play with you.” Said Sheila. 

I said, “Firemen need families and money and I want to be a fireman. 
You will be my wife.”  Sheila said firemen are dirty and I was dirty 
and she was dirty, so I said, “Wives are dirty, so we should make a 
fireman family.”  Sheila broke my firetruck. 

“Yes, there are firewomen.”  Mom said. 

“I need Sheila to be a firewoman, so she'll be my wife.” Mom laughed,
she said, “Be nice to your firewoman, firewomen love nice guys who love 
them back.” 

I bought Sheila flowers because I wanted to be a fireman and I loved her
and promised her lots of money.  There were no fires to put out, but I 
waited patiently for them.  When Sheila's house burned down, Sheila 
married me and she stayed inside my toy box and I made sure she knew 
what a big mistake she had made letting her house burn down when she 
could have been my firewoman in our fireproof house.  I made her a 
rubber tarp.  She lived inside the new truck. 

The fireman came back, “But, it could have been prevented.  And this
terrible loss is something that we wish to never see again.  Everyone 
at the Hall is shaken up, but it's a daily thing.  You can't just stop 
and think.” 

At school he said, “Today we learn to stop, drop, and roll.” 

I rode my bicycle to school and bought flowers and took Personal
Academic Computing and ate Apple Cinnamon Cheerios and became aware of 
sex. 

My dad said, “Those are movies for adults, when you get older you'll
understand why only married couples who trust each other, like mom and 
dad, watch them.” 

“I want to be a fireman.  I need to be big and strong like them.” 



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