Sass - Is It Dead And Gone? (standard:humor, 617 words)
Author: J P St. Jullian	Added: Sep 03 2002	Views/Reads: 3402/1	Story vote: 0.00 (0 votes)
We all resent that little invasion of our privacy in the form of the nosy question, but it can be delivered with sass.

Sass - Is It Dead And Gone? 

by J P St. Jullian 

Sass is a term you don't hear much in this day and age.  It used to be
heard quite a lot in my youth.  Some of you may have had your mother of 
grandmother tell you in a no-nonsense way, “Boy, don't you give me none 
of your sass!” 

What exactly is “sass.”  The dictionary says, “Impertinent,
disrespectful speech; back talk.”  I call it  “back talk with 
backbone.”  It is a tart, witty rejoinder asserting one's position, and 
rights.  It is amusing because of its tartness and because of the power 
that backs it up . . . if it is backed up. 

At times sass can seem like little more than a simple statement that
lays all your cards out on the table.  One way to make it more than a 
mere statement is to accentuate the strength of your position by the 
terseness of the rejoinder.  Such was the reply of General McAuliffe in 
the Battle of the Bulge who, having been requested to surrender by the 
Germans replied, “Nuts!”  This reply had great economy of words, and 
the decisiveness of the General's action gave sassiness to that one 
word. Then there was Satchel Paige, who once threw a no-hitter and was 
accused of using illegal pitches.  Said Satchel, “I never throw no 
illegal pitch. The trouble is, once in a while I toss one that ain't 
never been seen by this generation."  I'm sure you can think of other 
occasions when sass was used to create a meaningful reply to an absurd 
situation. 

Terseness reaches its peak when no words at all are used.  That is the
good thing about sass, it can be implemented by the use of words, or 
actions.  One classic example of this is the story of Babe Ruth 
answering the boos of the crowd by pointing his bat at the center field 
flagpole and then hitting a homer over it.  (At least, that's the way I 
understand it.)  Any player on the field can point a bat and make a 
brag, but when he backs his gesture up by hitting the ball over the 
spot indicated, that's sass, implemented by action. 

One of the techniques I've used to make a simple statement sassy was to
leave some doubt about the true meaning of my statement.  That often 
confused the person being sassed.  They were unsure whether to be 
offended or not.  By the way, I stole that technique from Benjamin 
Franklin. If you're a history buff, like me, and you ever had occasion 
to view the letter that Benjamin Franklin wrote to William Strahan in 
1775 (but did not send), you will notice that the way the words are 
arranged on the page that it may mean either of two things.  It goes as 
follows: 

“You are a member of Parliament, and one of that majority which has
doomed my country to destruction.  You have begun to burn our towns and 
murder our people.  Look upon your hands! They are stained with the 
blood of your relations!  You and I were long friends:  You are now my 
enemy and, 

I am 

Yours, 

BENJAMIN FRANKLIN” 

Clever, clever. 

We all resent that little invasion of our privacy in the form of the
nosy question, but it can be delivered with sass.  You can always avoid 
answering a great many of those type questions simply by purposely 
misinterpreting the questioner's meaning.  That's the fun part! 

My point is that as any good study of American humor and laughter will
show, there are countless situations when good old down home American 
sass---not sauce, mind you---is a welcome ingredient in any 
conversation. 


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