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Lazy Does Have Its Advantages (standard:humor, 900 words)
Author: GodspenmanAdded: Apr 28 2019Views/Reads: 1617/0Story vote: 0.00 (0 votes)
I wish my father was here because then I would tell him that sometimes the situation needs “a slack hand.”
 



As a young boy, my father tried drilling into my brain that laziness was
not acceptable in his house. If I wanted to be lazy, I had to go 
outside. He provided a wonderful role model for me because if my father 
was anything, he was not lazy. He tried to encourage me not to be lazy. 


Laziness, according to him, was an attack on common decency and energy.
After all these years, I have tried to live up to his standard. And 
yet, I must confess that I have found that laziness may have an 
advantage or two. I'm leaning towards the two. 

It was my fortune to marry a young lady who did not have an inkling of
laziness in any of her bones. I thought when I first married her; she 
was trying to impress me with how active she was and how much she could 
get done. I have discovered, however, that that certainly was not the 
case. Laziness and she have never met as far as I understand it. 

I have tried not to be lazy and to a certain extent, I have succeeded.
However, as I get older I begin to appreciate the opportunity of 
laziness. It does not have the bad connotation I was taught down 
through the years. 

Everything has its good side and its bad side. The great joy of life is
trying to find the good side in everything. This includes laziness. 
Anybody can point out the bad side to laziness, but it takes a genius 
to discover the good side of laziness. I am not pretending to be that 
genius, but I can say that I have discovered a good side to laziness. 

The good side of laziness occurred to me recently. My wife loves to put
together “Honey-Do-Lists” for her husband. That would be me, of course. 


Let me say that just because it's called a “Honey-Do-Lists” does not
mean that there is any sweetness to it. In fact, from my own personal 
experience I have yet to find any sweetness in that activity. I call it 
an activity because I am supposed to actively do everything on that 
list. 

It was a Monday morning and as usual, the Gracious Mistress of the
Parsonage handed to me her weekly “Honey-Do-List." As usual, the list 
was quite long and in great detail. 

“Make sure,” she said rather seriously, “that you do everything on that
list as soon as possible.” 

One of the things I have often wanted to ask my wife is what is her
meaning of “as soon as possible”? It seems that I have not the faintest 
idea of what it really means. As a well-seasoned husband, I smile most 
graciously as she hands me that list and say, “Yes, dear.” Her list 
comes as close to a novel as anything she does. 

It takes several days for me to read that list and try to understand
what I am supposed to do with it. But, with my experience, I do the 
best I can and there have been several times, not many, that I have 
finished her list to the last point. 

It was about Thursday when I was going over the list and saw several
things that had not been checked off. I sighed very deeply, and with 
determination planned to get back in the saddle again. I find it very 
hard to juggle what I want to do with her “Honey-Do-List.” It is always 
a struggle because I know I have to do her list, but in my mind, I 
really want to do my list. 

I was drinking some coffee and looking over this list to see what my
next assignment was. At that time, the Gracious Mistress of the 
Parsonage came into the room and said, “Did you do the 12th item on my 
list?” 

At the time, I was a little startled because I did not know what she was
getting at. I did not know if this was a quiz or if I was being 
evaluated by my work. I was a little concerned because there were some 
little nuggets of lazy that had peppered my week up to this point. 

Looking at her I said, “No, I haven't got to number 12 yet. I'm still
working on number 10.” 

She sighed such a deep sigh of relief that it frightened me a little. I
was afraid if I said I had not accomplished number 12 I would be in 
serious trouble. After all, it was on the list and I was supposed to do 
everything on the list. 

“I'm so glad you didn't do that. It was my mistake and I would've been
in serious trouble had you done it.” 

As it turned out it was her doctor's appointment, which was scheduled
for next month. She got the date wrong. I do not think I could have 
fooled her doctor into thinking I was her. 

If it was not for my laziness at the time, I am not sure who would have
been in more trouble, her or me. 

I was reminded of a verse my father liked to quote. “He becometh poor
that dealeth with a slack hand: but the hand of the diligent maketh 
rich” (Proverbs 10:4). 

I wish my father was here because then I would tell him that sometimes
the situation needs “a slack hand.”


   


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