Big "C" - Final (standard:non fiction, 3276 words) [3/3] show all parts
Author: casio1933	Added: May 07 2008	Views/Reads: 2365/1782	Part vote: 0.00 (0 votes)
The last three chapters are combined here.

A NORMAL LIFE? 

Six weeks after surgery,  the doctors released Dad to  return  to  work.
 He  was hoping things would get  back  to  normal soon.  Everyone kept 
asking, "Are you OK?  Are you sure you're really OK?”  In other words,  
"when are you going  to     die?"  Mom was going through the same thing 
at work, everyone  was "interested" ‑‑ or curious.  The 
surgery and after effects  had  been  very traumatic for both of  them. 
They wanted nothing more than to try and get on with their lives. 

Mom and  Dad were giving a lot of thought to the future.  There was no
assurance there would not be a  recurrence of  cancer in some other 
part of the body.  They were functioning,  but in a sort of limbo.  
This went on for a month or so and  they had not been able to make any 
real decisions.  The  lot was paid for,  the house plans completed.  
Yet they couldn't bring themselves to start construction.  They had 
been very politely avoiding a realistic discussion of the future, the 
possibilities, and their options. 

Usually on Friday night, Mom and Dad would get together with some
friends and go out to dinner.  This Friday they decided to take a ride 
alone.  They headed to the Blue Ridge Parkway and drove North from the 
Peaks of Otter to Route 60, where they turned around and retraced their 
path.  My Mom and Dad did a lot of talking that night and discussed a 
lot of problems.  They continued the discussion after the returned 
home.  After  a half dozen beers or so they were pretty frank with each 
other about their options,  the possibilities the future held and, for 
the first time since Dad found out he had cancer, they decided to put 
it aside.  Not that they didn't think about it,  they made a firm 
commitment to each other to not let  it stand in the way of the 
decisions they had to make ‑ after all you could get "run over by 
a truck" any day going to or  coming from work.  The cancer would not 
rule their lives and never again influence a decision.  The house was a 
go. 

NOT GETTING IT UP 

Mom and Dad have always felt that sex was not the most important thing
in their life.  They didn't realize how important a part it did play 
until they had experienced the frustration of not being able to engage 
in it.  Dad said it was like trying to push a lawn mower with a rope.  
Although he could reach a climax (with no ejaculation),  he could  
achieve  no erection and could do little to help Mom's frustration. 

They  didn't think any less of each other.  Something  taken for
granted, a beautiful part of their lives, was gone.  They were having a 
tough time trying to overcome it.  No  matter how much they tried to 
not let it affect their lives,  it was beginning  to impact their daily 
routine and their  relationship with each other. 

Mom and Dad never got to snapping or shouting at each  other.  They're
so damn super sensitive with each other,  neither of them could have 
stood that.  Times were tense and though they talk  a lot,  they 
couldn't figure what to do to help matters.  They were overly polite to 
each other.  Mom would not wear  her sexy nighties anymore and they 
were careful not to get into any heavy petting ‑ Dad had stopped 
patting her on the ass when she walked by.  Good night kisses were 
chaste.  There  was little fondling.  After the unsuccessful  attempts 
to engage in sex,  they both experienced the frustration and feelings 
of inadequacy ‑ they would lie apart  staring  into the dark.  
They felt they were growing apart. 

Mom is the dearest thing in Dad's life.  He felt that  something had to
be done, what he wasn't sure.  One night, after the good night kiss 
ended up with a lot of sophomoric  groping,  futile attempts at love 
making and the subsequent frustration, Dad told Mom he thought she may 
want to consider having an affair.  He didn't want to know when or with 
 whom.  He  felt sex was a lot less important than preserving their 
love and the relationship they enjoyed 99 percent of the time.  Dad had 
been unable to think of an alternate solution, and he sure as hell 
didn't think he could do her any  good in the sex department.  Mom said 
she sure didn't  think that having an affair was the answer to their  
problem  and  they said nothing else on the subject. 

They got through that winter OK and moved into their new home  in the


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