he gave me a rose (standard:non fiction, 1296 words)
Author: cuddlebug	Added: Aug 14 2003	Views/Reads: 3429/2248	Story vote: 0.00 (0 votes)
how I lost my best friend, my first short story ever.

My best friend has been off meth for almost 5 months. He said it's cause
of me, I say it's cause of him. We won't ever be able to argue about it 
though, because we will never speak again. 

The first time I seen CB, he was wide eyed running through my house. I
didn't know what to think about him really. He calls himself "batty". I 
kind of laughed half with him, half at him for acting so silly. It 
wasn't the last time I seen him like that. 

We didn't met again until the beginning of the next year, when I was
infiltrating the "bat cave" and he was there popping pills out of their 
pack. I kinda made myself at home and just sat down and helped. We 
ended up laying down and fooling around a little, laughed a little, 
then went back to his house. When we woke in the morning, I remember 
the sensualism of it. He gave me a black hoodie to wear and I rested my 
head car door as he drove. I remember the weather that day, the breeze, 
the morning air. I remember feeling free and happy that day. I knew 
then that the man in the seat next to me would be someone special in my 
life. I sprayed that jacket with my perfume when I returned it; hoping 
he'd think about me. 

The next 8 months are sketchy, I was drinking so much, trying to find
inner peace, but mostly ended up empty. CB became my friend, I confided 
in him and grew to trust him. One day we drove for an hour, just to get 
ingredients for what I will call poison. That car trip was crazy, CB 
just had to ride with me. Ever time we got into the car he would have 
to sit in front with me, it made me feel good, but in front of him I 
would just roll my eyes and laugh. At first, I didn't look at him like 
a guy, like when I seen my favorite actor, it was different. 

The day I knew he cared about me was early on, I was trying to get with
a friend of his, at first I thought CB was just being a jerk, telling 
me bad things about his friend, but after it was all said and done CB 
was right about him. Countless times we would just drive around and 
raise hell, we weren't really doing anything, just living. The first 
time I missed CB was when he went to jail for awhile. I visited him the 
first chance I got, I was so worried about him. He told me later on he 
loved me even then, I never knew. People do not understand the word 
"friend". We did. I was always worried about CB. One day he came to my 
house, he had taken a few too many pills and he stayed that night. I 
had plans that night, but I wasn't going to leave his side. He was 
pretty bad off, and I was scared, I kept waking him up to make sure he 
was ok. That's the first time I knew I cared about him. 

Sometimes I didn't know what to think about him, I have seen his smash
his head against the wall, I never laughed so hard when he told me he 
wanted to run into the wall. The mental picture had me hysterical. One 
day he made these noodles at the house and they were all soggy and 
gross, but CB ate them up, like I said, sometimes I didn't understand 
him. I had to look out for CB, I hurt people trying to help him , 
trying to keep him out of trouble. It wasn't something I have ever done 
for anyone else in my life, nor will I ever again. I couldn't let 
anything happen to him, he was my best friend after all. 

I don't remember how or exactly when he got off drugs. I remember how he
was though. For weeks he would eat and sleep that's all. I would 
research on the internet on withdrawal, to try to help him, to make it 
easier for him. There wasn't much I could do. I just tried to be there 
for him. But after that time period was over, I was so proud of him, 
that he had done it. 

There were phone calls that lasted forever, and then there were times I
wouldn't answer the phone. We plotted and schemed on what seemed to be 
everyone and everything. What did we ever talk about? 

We spent almost every day together back then. Back then, back when it
wasn't about anything but friendship. Then it happened. All the times 
we had laughed and acted silly, all those times were about to change. 
And I can't really admit to myself if I regret it fully or not. I can't 
regret the time we spent together cause it happened, I can't say I 
would of done anything different. But we took everything one step 
further. I am not sure how it happened and honestly I don't remember 
much, but our relationship changed that day, and wouldn't ever be the 
same. After that, it was blissful. I seen CB as a man, my man. At first 
I tried to fight it, but not long after that my world revolved around 


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