Jessica (youngsters:drama, 2728 words)
Author: Ember	Added: May 24 2003	Views/Reads: 5467/3203	Story vote: 0.00 (0 votes)
This is a story about a girl who has to deal with hope and despair in such way that not many know what is going on. Would appreciate feeback, greatly. The format isn't how I originally had it, but eh. Close enough!

Click here to read the first 75 lines of the story


“But that was High school.  You're out of college now, with a blossoming
career.  Why haven't you moved on yet?” He asked. 

“Old trends die hard?” I grinned and looked at my watch, “I've got to
go.” 

“Jessica,” he said, as I stood, “I don't believe anymore sessions will
do you any good if that's all you're willing to tell me.” 

“It's been nice chatting with you, Doc,” I said. 

Yeah, like I was ever going to tell him everything else.  Too many hurts
for me to cry about in front of a stranger.  Especially one who may 
know part of the cause personally.  Like Jack.  God, Jack, you're 
utterly unforgettable. 

************************************************************************


Soon after Amber and Sam left, I changed quite drastically apparently. 
My once long brown hair became short, black, and blue.  In fact I 
pretty much turned into a walking, black-clad depression.  All my old 
friends abandoned me in my obvious hour of need, and what used to be 
verbal fights quickly became physical.  I still managed, somehow, to do 
well in my classes and with my teachers, though.  Some part of myself 
would not give up on the grades that I'd worked so hard to achieve. 

When Sam came back three months later, it was with out Amber, but with
Jack Palpton.  Jack was his peer therapist, a part of the recovery 
program.  Amber was still at the center and would remain for at least 
another three months.  As soon as Sam got home he called me. 

“Hey, Jess,” he exclaimed, “guess what!” “You're home,” I stated,
unenthused. “Yeah,” he said, “look, can I talk with you in person?” 
“Where?” I asked simply. “In the park.  There's someone I'd like you to 
meet.” He said. “Great,” I said and hung up. 

I recognized Sam immediately.  He was at our old hiding place among a
grove of trees.  I recognized him, but my heart didn't leap at the 
sight.  He and Jack sat, talking animatedly.  I approached and Sam did 
a double take at my appearance, and ended up staring at me slack jawed. 


“What do you want?” I asked tersely. “I wanted to introduce you to Jack
Palpton, my peer therapist, he's part of my rehab program.  He's here 
to monitor all that I do so that I don't mess up again.” “Nice to meet 
you Jessica,” Jack said, “Sam has been telling me what a positive 
influence you've been to him.” 

I snorted. 

“Fat lot of good I did,” I said, “Nice to meet you Jack, but if that's
all, I have to get going.” “Actually no,” Jack said, “I'd like to ask 
you to help in Sam's recovery.” “I'll think about it,” I said, and 
left. 

About a week later Sam and Jack came back to school, for our senior
year.  Everyone was very huggy and supportive.  I sat in class and 
waited.  All the teachers sat him in the usual seat, next to me, to try 
to keep things normal. 

One day, in a free period, while Jack was off getting some water, Sam
decided to talk. 

“You've changed, Jess,” he said. “No shit,” I replied. “Why?” He asked
pleadingly. “WHY?!” I nearly screamed, “WHY?! YOU want to you know 
WHY?!” 

Just then Jack came back in and I shut my mouth.  Sam tried again to
talk but I stood and walked over to a window.  Jack followed. 

“I understand you used to be nice,” he said coldly. 

I glared out the window, refusing to let myself care what he might think
of me.  He sighed. 

“I'm sorry,” he apologized, “that was uncalled for.  I need help from
someone who knew Sam.  Someone who can tell him how much he damaged his 
life and those around him.” 

I looked up at him.  I met his eyes, perhaps the biggest mistake I ever
did.  As soon as I met the depths of his green eyes, I almost melted.  
Just as quickly as it happened, I looked away and felt his hand on my 
shoulder.  I shook it off, though my body and heart tried fiercely to 
rebel. 

“I'll write a letter,” I begrudged. “Thank you,” he said, and left me. 

For the rest of the period, I wrote a three page long letter to Sam.  I
handed it to Jack on my way out. 

After that, Jack would often catch me alone and just quietly sit down
next to me and start a conversation.  Mostly I gave him brief and 
concise answers, but enough well thought-out and passionate ones that 
he kept coming back.  I learned about his past, and what he hoped for 
his future.  I knew I was falling for him, and hard, and I knew that I 
was a project in his eyes, another Sam.  Yet, for some reason, I 
couldn't pull myself away. 

The first time Jack and Sam saw me fight, they were both shocked.  I
hadn't been in a fight since Sam had come back, but I didn't start it 
this time.  This girl just decided that I was a delectable challenge.  
So this girl only landed two punches on me before I had her on the 
ground, both arms twisted back, and my knee in the small of her back.  
She begged mercy and I let up.  She had no mark of the fight.  I, 
however, sported a black eye and a cut above my eyebrow.  After it was 
over Sam went back to his populars and Jack came over to me.  I sat 
propped against a tree my sleeve to my head. 

“That wasn't a fair fight,” he said. “You're telling me,” I sighed,
“wearing rings is dirty fighting.” “I meant,” he said, rummaging 
through his back-pack, “that you were obviously more skilled than your 
opponent, but you never once attacked, merely defended and disabled.” 

I shrugged.  He pulled out a First-Aid kit, and I winced. 

“Put your arm down,” he said, and went to work on cleaning and bandaging
the cut. “There,” he said, wiping off his hands, “good as new.” 
“Thanks,” I said. “No problem,” he said, “just make me a promise.” 
“Depends,” I said. “Try not to get into anymore fights,” he asked, and 
walked back to Sam. 

A few days before school was to end for us seniors, Jack and I were
having our usual conversation.  He'd let Sam wander out of his sight as 
a reward for being good, so we were all alone, everyone else wandering 
around in a more interesting area. 

“You know,” he said, “I'm going to leave soon.” “Why?” I asked. “This is
my senior year, too,” he smiled. “I have to get home and see my family 
before I leave for college.” “Stupid college,” I pouted. 

He laughed, and very unexpectedly, took my face into his hands and
kissed me.  It was heaven on Earth.  He was the first guy I'd kissed 
since Sam, and you could tell he had experience. 

“I'm sorry,” he said. “Why?!” I asked, and kissed him again. “Stop,” he
panted, “I can't do this.  I can't trust you enough.” “What do you 
mean?” I asked. “I mean,” he said, avoiding my eyes, “that your 
attitude is so haywire, I don't know which is the real you.  And I need 
to know, I feel so lost otherwise.” 

I looked at him solemnly then stood up and left him there.  When I got
into my car, I looked back and saw him with his head in his hands, and 
he looked to be shivering, even though it was 90 degrees.  I looked 
away, and drove home.  Once again, the grapevine fed me info.  Jack 
would be leaving the day after us senior were to be released upon the 
world.  The night before he was to leave, I called him at Sam's. 

“Hey, Jack,” I said. “Hi, Jess,” he replied. “Look,” I said, “ I know
you're leaving tomorrow and all, but do you think we might be able to 
talk before then, in person?” “Sure, when and where?” he asked. “The 
park,” I said, “ where we first were introduced.  When does your flight 
leave?” “5 p.m.” he said. “How about 2 p.m. then?” I said after some 
quick calculations. “Sounds good, bye then.” He said. “Bye,” I said. 

The next day I arrived early at the park, and something completely
unexpected occurred. 

“Hello, Jessica,” I heard a voice say. “Amber?!” I spun to face her. 

She was as radiant as ever.  There was however, I spark in her eye.  A
glint I should have recognized as anger as soon as I saw her, but I was 
too preoccupied. 

“Surprised?” she asked. “Yeah,” I said, “I am.” “Well so was I,” she
hissed, “when Sam dumped me.  He said he didn't feel our relationship 
was as ‘real' as he first thought.” “I'm sorry,” I said, “ but how does 
this relate to me?” “You're the ‘real' reason,” she glared at me, 
“You're the whore no one knows, the little slut who plays with all 
those around her, the...” 

I don't know what it was.  Maybe that she was calling me all that I
hated, but I swung at her.  Hit her right in the jaw.  A warning punch 
mind you.  No real damage to her.  However, it landed me in more 
trouble than anything else I've ever done. 

“Jessica?” I heard a voice gasp. 

I spun and saw Jack standing there gaping at me.  Amber saw the
opportunity and tackled me.  As the wind was knocked out of me, I saw 
Jack's jaw set and watched him turn and walk away.  A fierce fight 
broke out between us two desperate women.  When I finally managed to 
get home around 4 p.m., I had a ripped T-shirt, a fresh black eye, a 
sprained ankle and wrist, and a bruised windpipe.  I called Sam's got 
Jack's flight info and set off before my parents could utter a sound. 

As soon as I was in the airport, I ran to the terminal.  Jack and Sam
stood  talking with their backs to me, by the entrance ramp. 

“I though I'd reached her,” Jack sighed. “She'd just that way now,
Jack.” Sam patted his back. “Last call for boarding.” Called the flight 
attendant. 

Jack started forward. 

“Wait,” I managed, through my bruised windpipe. “What the hell happ...”
Jack gasped. “Let me talk,” I wheezed. 

He nodded. 

“I came to say I'm sorry.  Sorry you didn't know me before.  Sorry that
I couldn't help you with Sam.  Sorry I didn't become what you wanted of 
me.  Sorry that Amber caught me off guard.” 

Sam gasped at the mention of Amber. 

“But I am also not sorry that I've fallen in love with you.  Yes, I
know, this is the first you've heard of it, but better late than never. 
 The only reason I tell you now is not just to relieve myself of it 
though, it is so that you will not become what I am.  I want you to 
know that I will love you no matter what you do, smart or stupid.  You 
just need to know I love you." 

Then I turned and began leaving, or rather limping. 

“Wait,” he said. 

In that instance, I had this overpowering hope, that maybe life would
turn out for the better.  Maybe this would be my fairy-tale ending.  I 
turned to him. 

“Thank you,” he said, “I'll never forget.” 

I smiled, and he smiled, and we both turned and walked away.  Sam caught
up to me within a matter of seconds, and even though I hadn't talked to 
him since the letter, he offered to be my human crutch.  We became the 
friends again in that instance. 

************************************************************************


Sam and Jack shared constant correspondence and, though I never asked,
Sam always told me what Jack was up to and that he had asked about me 
and such.  Time flew by once Sam and I became friends again.  He and I 
continued on into college together, there he met his true love, 
Elisabeth.  She was a great woman, we became fast and great friends.  
They had a beautiful wedding, I was maid-of-honor.  And what an honor 
it was.  In the toast at the reception, I declared Elisabeth my 
honorary sister.  Jack was invited.  I caught a glimpse of him at the 
ceremony, but he didn't stay for the reception afterwards. 

Jack is now a renowned Psychiatrist.  Gee, who would have guessed.  I
keep track of him through the school he is currently working at and 
through all the articles he writes.  And Dr. Slater wondered why I 
wouldn't tell him more.  It's not just the pain, it that fact that he 
may know part of my pain personally. 

I always wished for a fairy-tale like life.   You know, with how
everything fits together  perfectly, but this is life.  This is my 
life.  This is reality.  Life is but an instance.  An instance too 
precious to waste.  I learned that the hard way. 


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