WHY ENGLISH IS SO HARD TO LEARN ??? (standard:other, 581 words)
Author: arunovia	Added: May 11 2003	Views/Reads: 4709/3	Story vote: 0.00 (0 votes)
slightly long, but makes for good reading.... take your time and read it!!

WHY ENGLISH IS SO HARD TO LEARN ??? 

slightly long, but makes for good reading.... take your time and read
it!! 

1. The bandage was wound around the wound. 

2. The farm was used to produce produce. 

3. The dump was so full that it had to refuse more refuse. 

4. We must polish the Polish furniture. 

5. He could lead if he would get the lead out. 

6. The soldier decided to desert his dessert in the desert. 

7. Since there is no time like the present, he thought it was time to
present the present. 

8. A bass was painted on the head of the bass drum. 

9. When shot at, the dove dove into the bushes. 

10. I did not object to the object. 

11. The insurance was invalid for the invalid. 

12. There was a row among the oarsmen about how to row. 

13. They were too close to the door to close it. 

14. The buck does funny things when the does are present. 

15. A seamstress and a sewer fell into the sewer. 

16. To help with planting, the farmer taught his sow to sow. 

17. The wind was too strong to wind the sail. 

18. After a number of injections my jaw got number. 

19. Upon seeing the tear in the painting, I shed a tear. 

20. I had to subject the subject to a series of tests. 

21. How can I intimate this to my most intimate friend? 

Let's face it - English is a crazy language. There is no egg in eggplant
nor ham in hamburger, neither apple nor pine in pineapple. English 
muffins weren't invented in England or French fries in France. 
Sweetmeats are candies while sweetbreads, which aren't sweet, are meat. 


We take English for granted. But if we explore its paradoxes, we find
that quicksand can work slowly, boxing rings are square and a guinea 
pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig. And why is it that writers 
write but fingers don't fing, grocers don't groce and hammers don't 
ham? 

If the plural of tooth is teeth, why isn't the plural of booth beeth?
One goose, two geese. So one moose, two meese? One index, two indices? 
Doesn't it seem crazy that you can make amends but not one amend? If 
you have a bunch of odds and ends and get rid of all but one of them, 
what do you call it? If teachers taught, why didn't preachers praught? 
If a vegetarian eats vegetables, what does a humanitarian eat? 
Sometimes I think all English speakers should be committed to an  
asylum for the verbally insane. In what language do people recite a 
play and play at a recital? Ship by truck and send cargo by ship? Have 
noses that run and feet that smell? How can a slim chance and a fat 
chance be the same, while a wise man and a wise guy are opposites? You 
have to marvel at the unique lunacy of a language in which your house 
can burn up as it burns down, in which you fill in a form by filling it 
out and in which an alarm goes off by going on. English was invented by 
people and not computers and it reflects the creativity of the human 
race, which, of course, is not a race at all. That is why, when the 
stars are out, they are visible, but when the lights are out, they are 
invisible. 


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