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George and Gina. An intelligent planet and his only human resident. (standard:science fiction, 8419 words)
Author: Oscar A RatAdded: Jul 02 2020Views/Reads: 1418/974Story vote: 0.00 (0 votes)
George was a happy and successful planet until that thrice damned roach opera. At its conclusion, customers stomped the performers and left George, without paying their rent, all that is except Gina.
 



This story was a surprise for me, one I almost finished and stored away
for years, thinking it was too silly to finish and post anywhere.  
Finally, I did finish and post it on a writing site.  Later, I was 
shocked to actually sell it to a small publisher who read it on THIS 
site for real money.  Not much, but every little bit helps. ---------- 

Gina packed a last suitcase and left a filthy apartment.  Carrying her
luggage across the hall, she went into a reasonably clean bedroom and 
unpacked it again.  During the next half-hour or so, the woman went 
back and forth across the corridor, moving boxes of possessions from 
one living space to the other.  For the heavier items, she used an 
anti-gravity hand-truck.  It was a familiar procedure, one that she had 
performed almost monthly for hundreds of years.  The time in each 
apartment or house depended on how fast they dirtied and how quickly 
her planet, named George, happened to be traveling at the time.  
Currently, he rested by spinning around a certain sun near Beta 2B8174. 
 Time in days and years had little meaning when your home planet often 
moved from one sun to another. 

George was an intelligent planet and Gina his only current human
occupant.  When George tired of one location he would pack up, 
figuratively, and move.  Gina followed the same rules.  After all, she 
didn't want to cross her landlord.  Where would she go if George kicked 
her off? 

When her apartment became too dirty, why clean?  Just move.   Ever since
that Roach Opera, she had a world full of clean, or relatively clean, 
homes to choose from.  Gina remembered that fateful day clearly.  It 
was when George, strapped for cash, unwisely hosted a performance of 
the Cockroach Operatic Company. 

A Roach Opera is a rare event since it takes billions of years for an
infestation of cockroaches on a planet to reach mental and social 
maturity.  Roaches aren't very intelligent by nature and slow in 
developing to their musical stage. Then, more ages pass before they get 
to the point of giving a good performance. 

When it does happen, nearby planets empty, residents rushing to the
arena to enjoy a performance somewhat unique in the universe.   
Afterward, when the audience realizes what they've done, their natural 
aversion to roaches invariably sets them to stomping the singers and 
musicians, eliminating any chances of encores. 

George's entire population, except for Gina -- who happened to have
received volume eight of the "Complete All Time Entire Never Before 
Offered Collection Of I Love Lucy Television Performances" -- hurried 
to watch the universe's most unique performance. 

After the cheering and subsequent stomping the audience, including his
tenants, jumped onto space buses and other craft, leaving George and 
Gina alone.  Most humans were embarrassed to be seen on a planet 
infested with so many cockroaches. 

And that was without either giving George the required thirty-days
advance notice, or even catching up on their rents. He did end up with 
a huge amount of advance box office receipts. 

That reaction angered George enough for him to eject the remaining roach
population into a nearby sun, ridding himself of the pests. 

For some reason unknown to either George or Gina, not that Gina really
cared, George's human population had never returned, probably too 
embarrassed to face public exposure.  When Gina finished with her 
favorite Lucille Ball series, she found herself alone with an entire 
planet to herself. 

On his part, George, needing even half-way intelligent companionship,
allowed her free rein, and rent. 

“George, the sink is plugged.  Can you fix it?”  Gina called out to her
planetary landlord. 

After a few seconds, she heard a gurgling and the previous occupant's
dishwater drained, leaving a greasy deposit.  One good thing about 
having a planet to yourself, she figured, was the quick service. 


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