The Volume Discount (standard:drama, 1258 words)
Author: K. Derby	Added: May 14 2004	Views/Reads: 3557/2303	Story vote: 0.00 (0 votes)
A neighbour man sees something unusual going on at a neighbours house. I'm back after a dreadful block.

Click here to read the first 75 lines of the story


The skinny guy gave a wink to the big guy.  "Sure, our prices are a
steal," he said. 

"Yeah, we're a steal," added the big guy with a slack looking grin. 

*** 

The thin guy was kneeling in front of my TV, squinting at its cockeyed
picture.  "Yep, she's broke, all right," said the thin guy after a few 
perfunctory taps on the remote.  He stood, and shoved the remote into 
his pocket.  "It's gonna have to go back to the shop," he said gravely. 


I heard his partner snicker from over by my stereo. 

I nodded from by the fireplace.  "As long as you're reasonable," I said
hesitantly. 

"Oh, yeah, no problem," muttered the thin guy looking around.  "Do you
have any other electronics that need fixin'?" he asked, casting a 
dubious eye on my decrepit stereo system. 

"Well, if you don't mind, my big screen projection TV is looking a
little pale," I said. 

The thin guy shot me a glance.  "You got one of those?" he asked. 

"Sure," I said dismissively.  "It's in the basement with my home theatre
setup."  I paused at the sudden gleam in his eye.  "If you cut me a 
deal, you could take that with you too.  One of the speakers is 
sounding all crackly," I explained. 

"We'll give you a real steal, a volume discount!" said the thin guy,
flashing me a wolfish grin. 

"Just through that door and down the stairs," I said, waving a hand
towards the basement door. 

The thin guy went downstairs first. 

I hit his big partner over the head with a cheapo fireplace poker,
knocking him unconscious, before going downstairs to finish the job. 

The thin guy seemed surprised when he didn't see a big screen TV. 

*** 

"Wakey, wakey!" I said, cheerfully tossing a glass of cold water into
the thin guy's face.  "Rise and shine, sleepums!" 

"What the hell?" grumbled the thin guy, experimentally rattling the
handcuff that bound him and his partner to a basement beam.  The big 
guy just moaned. 

"Like them?" I asked, hooking a thumb at the cuffs.  "Left over from a
former girlfriend."  I turned and picked up a whip, giving it a slight 
crack to uncoil it.  "She liked it when I chained her up while I was 
using this."  I shook my head at his wide-eyed expression.  "I could 
never understand it myself either, I prefer to be on the giving end you 
see."  I lifted the whip again and flicked it, letting it thump against 
the big guy's belly. 

I saw a widening dark stain spread over his greasy looking jeans.  He'd
wet himself. 

"Wait!" shouted the thin guy, straining at his handcuff.  "You can't..."


I smiled broadly and spoke again, cutting him off.  "You didn't really
think that I had fallen for that TV repairman shtick, did you?"  I 
snorted.  "Give me some credit, okay?"  I leaned forward getting a good 
whiff of his unwashed fear.  "Besides, Benson never said anything about 
his TV being broken."   I paused, savoring the moment as I cracked the 
whip again.  "And believe me, he talked like crazy before he died..." 

*** 

I opened the door at the knock.  It was Benson. 

"So, how did it go?" he asked walking into my house. 

"Pretty quiet," I said.  "I got your mail on the kitchen table." 

"Thanks," he said walking into my kitchen and beginning to riffle
through his two week accumulation of bills, flyers and junk. 

"How was Mexico?" I asked opening my fridge and grabbing a couple of
beers. 

"Oh, pretty good," he said taking my offered beer.  "Those five-star
hotels are all alike, you know." 

"I can imagine," I said dryly, leaning back against the fridge. 

"Say, is that a new TV?" he asked using the bottle to indicate the
fifty-two inch, widescreen projection TV gracing my living room.  He 
gave me a surprised looking glance.  "A new stereo too." 

I smiled.  "I got them used with a volume discount.  A real steal, you
might say." 


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