The Personal Ad (standard:romance, 3996 words)
Author: Sfbaywriter	Added: Feb 15 2002	Views/Reads: 3473/2360	Story vote: 0.00 (0 votes)
Can the internet and a few words bring together two people?

Click here to read the first 75 lines of the story

listen to some music. Neil Young he thought to himself so he put on his 
favorite CD. He plopped down onto his couch thinking about her 
response. Thom took another long sip of wine. His eyes looking straight 
ahead not focused on anything, thinking about how lonely he was. 

Feeling like he needed to do something, at least see if she was real, he
decided to respond to her. Thom knew his emotions and feelings were 
always close to the surface. Once he started writing almost anything 
could come out. "Would the right words?"  "What should I share with 
her?" "Is she even for real?"  He took another sip of wine and listened 
to Neil singing. He got up and stretched, then walked over to the 
computer to respond. "What do I have to lose?" He smiled and started to 
type. Thom told her of his love for music and art. How much he enjoyed 
being able to share his feelings and emotions with a gentle listener. 
How he realized how lonely his life had become and how he was 
struggling to understand why. He spoke of his passion for life and how 
hard it was for him not to be able to share this with someone. He told 
her of his love for his friends. How much they meant to him. 

He suddenly stopped, sat back and thought about the words he had
written. Surprised at how much he had written and wondering if too much 
had been shared. He knew his words revealed the depth of his 
loneliness. "Would she think he was desperate?" He wondered if she 
would smile as she read his words. No physical description was 
included. "Should he describe himself to her?" She would certainty be 
curious as he was about her. He thought about it and decided the 
response was fine and sent it off as is. It was 2am and he went back to 
his chair. Neil was singing about love once again. 

Liz woke up earlier than usual, feeling curious and surprised at how
anxiously she wanted a response from him. She went into the kitchen and 
turned on her expresso machine, wanting a double shot this morning. 
Julie had kept her up late last night talking on the phone, laughing at 
her response. They laughed about so many things. Julie was in love with 
cyber boy, as they both referred to him.  They did everything together. 
He would bring coffee to her in bed each morning and they would lie 
together watching the morning news. Most mornings they would end up 
making love.   He was open and shared his feelings and emotions freely. 
Listening to Julie made Liz realize she was missing something precious 
from her own life. 

She took her coffee and walked into her living area looking outside. Her
neighborhood was slowly coming to life on another cold and damp day.  
As she turned away from the window, she felt he had responded. When 
this thought registered, she suddenly felt nervous and unsure.   Her 
moves were slow, across the living room to the corner where her 
computer sat, feeling almost afraid to find he did not respond. She 
moved around her chair and pulled it in under her. She powered on the 
computer and took a sip of espresso. She waited patiently while the 
computer came to life and took a deep breath. She needed to know he was 
out there looking for her with the same desire, as she had to find him. 
Almost with one eye closed, she examined her mailbox.  There was one 
message in the mailbox. A smile came to her face. 

Liz read his response at least five times. She first noticed how
expressive he was, and how she could almost feel his presence through 
his words. She liked everything he wrote and how easy it was to feel 
his emotions, as he talked about his life, loves, and friends. She felt 
his hunger when he talked about what was missing in his life.  The 
response made her want to tell him how his thoughts had touched her.  
She had been hurt before however and was hesitant to reveal very much 
rapidly.  She needed to make sure she had control or at least did not 
let go of her emotions. She liked all he had to say, but who was he 
really? 

Liz shared with him her love of art and music and mentioned she had just
seen Neil Young in concert and considered him a poet. She talked about 
her life and friends, smiling as she wrote. A few words became a couple 
of pages. Her room brightened up suddenly as the sun broke through the 
gray day outside. The sun was a gift from him she thought. Rereading 
what was written, she was surprised how easily her thoughts were 
flowing. She liked what she wrote and sent off the response. She felt 
she had revealed enough. 

Thom was still in bed. Laying down thinking how he used to be up at
first light, ready to go out and take on the day. Each day he thought 
of as a chance to discover something to inspire him. "What had happened 
to his optimism?"  He convinced himself she was not going to respond. 
He thought his words were too intense and might overwhelm her. He 
wondered if anyone else might respond. 

He finally pulled himself out of bed around ten. He slowly moved into
his office. He looked at the computer. "Was there a note from her?" 
"What if there wasn't?" Did he really want to find out? He could not 
understand why her response mattered. But it did matter to him. So he 
sat down and logged in to his email. He saw her response, smiled and 
took a deep breath. 

Her words felt like a song to him. She told him so much about her life,
successes and failures, her loves, what she was looking for and how 
much she enjoyed his words. He pinched himself. Her note was amazing. 
Full of optimism and joy. He could feel her warmth and gentleness. Her 
humor touched him. 

Quickly he started to type. He told her he understood how she felt about
not having someone to share her life with. He told her a silly story 
about a friend of his, talked about how much he enjoyed her thoughts. 
He kept writing, unable to stop. Thoughts were rapidly moving through 
his body, down to his fingers, and finally onto the screen, flowing 
freely. He finished and sent her another email. Feeling the need to 
continue the conversation he started another note to thank her for 
sharing so much of herself with him and sent it. He noticed a surge of 
energy and realized he needed to start the day. He got dressed headed 
out, thinking of her words and wondering about her smile. 

She had checked at least three times already. No response yet. Her
feelings surprised her. She knew he might be away all-day or dealing 
with all of the daily tasks making up a human life. Yet not seeing a 
response worried her. She told herself to relax. After all, she really 
didn't know much about him and he might turn out to be a total jerk.  
She needed to let this develop on it's own time. 

She went for a walk and noticed how beautiful the day had become. While
she missed the autumn colors from her childhood, she had learned to 
appreciate a Northern California fall. She noticed the deep red maples 
and yellow poplars. For some reason, she thought they looked brighter 
than normal. Walking down the street smiling, she found her favorite 
coffee store and decided to get a cup of coffee. As she left the coffee 
store she wondered why she hadn't ever noticed the small patch of 
flowers growing right next to the store. She continued down the street 
and headed towards her favorite park. 

There was a small pond in the middle of the park. Parents would bring
their kids to play and feed the ducks. This was her favorite place to 
sit. Sometimes she would sit for hours watching the kids and their 
parents. As she sat watching, she found herself getting lost in his 
words. A voice echoed from far off. She wanted to ignore it, but it 
kept growing louder. "Excuse me, Do you have the time?" is what the 
voice was saying. She looked up smiling. She finally figured out what 
he had asked her. "Oh, I am sorry. I am somewhat lost in my dreams 
today," she said. "It's 11:30". She looked up at him and felt something 
she couldn't really figure out. Almost a feeling she knew him. She 
looked into his eyes and felt her legs get weak. She felt attracted to 
him immediately. He quickly said, "Thank you very much." and he started 
to jog away from her. She watched him move gracefully around the pond. 
Watching the jogger, she noticed a little boy being chased by a goose, 
which caused the boy to run into the jogger. The boy fell down crying. 
The jogger kneeled over and tenderly touched the boy. She watched the 
jogger looked around to find the boy's mother or father, while holding 
the child's hand in his. He turned back to the boy and said something 
to him. The boy smiled and stood back up. The mother came over and they 
exchanged a few words before he started running once again. As he moved 
around the far side of the pond, he looked over at Liz and smiled. 

She thought of her cyber friend and hoped he was as gentle as the
handsome jogger seemed to be. After a few more minutes of thought, she 
got up to walk back to her flat. She needed to see if he had responded 
yet and hoped he had. On her way back, everything seemed like a blur to 
her. She normally was able to hold her emotions in check, but today it 
seemed as if they were flowing through her quickly. Once home, she went 
right to the computer and logged on. She had two messages from him. She 
smiled and opened the first message. She quickly felt blown away. 

She laughed at the story about his friend Jim. She felt close to him as
he talked about how he enjoyed her thoughts. He made a few observations 
that hit home. He talked about how love had seemed so elusive to him. 
Each time he thought he might be on the path, instead of love he found 
pain and disappointment. She knew how he felt. For the first time, he 
spoke of his love for passion and physical intimacy, about work and his 
love of the outdoors. He described a particular park near where he 
lived. How he would watch with envy the mothers and fathers doting over 
their children. He talked about the love he could see all around him, 
close enough to reach out and touch, but unable to grasp and hold on 
to. Smiling and knowing exactly how he felt, she found herself being 
drawn to him in a way she could not quite understand. 

She continued to read his words and began to feel he seemed to be
looking for what she needed. He described himself physically. She liked 
the way he described himself, confidently but without ego. He talked 
about how he liked to run, not just for keeping in shape, but because 
it helped him to get in touch with his feelings. She knew what he 
meant. She hated the thought of running, but her walks were 
therapeutic. She sat back and took a deep breath, feeling closer to him 
and suddenly wanting to see him.  She opened up the second message. She 
smiled. It was so simple but said so much about him. Your welcome she 
wrote and quickly sent the reply. She looked up at the clock. It was 
now 1:30pm. 

She started to reply to his first message. She told him she thought she
would like Jim. As she watched her thoughts appear on the screen in 
front of her, she smiled. Liz told him she agreed with his 
observations. Her words continued to flow easily, almost like talking 
to an old friend. After awhile she suddenly paused, trying to decide 
how to describer herself to him. She knew she was attractive to men and 
received many looks as she moved around the city. She wanted him to 
know, but didn't want it to sound like it was too important. She wrote 
how love appeared a funny thing to her, always a possibility but never 
feeling close to her. She looked at the last sentence wanting to add a 
couple more words. but couldn't. Too soon she told herself. She felt a 
need to tell him his words were giving her reason to hope once again. 
So she held her breath and told him how much his words had touched her. 
How she could see so much of herself in what he had said. She let 
everything flow she was feeling. Sitting back she reviewed what she had 
written. She liked it. Her thoughts always came out better when she 
wrote. She closed her eyes and sent off the response. It was now 3:00. 
She thought about meeting him again. Tonight she wondered. Immediately 
she rejected it as too silly and soon. He probably has plans already. 
Too soon to ask she thought. 

She got up and walked away. She turned on some music. Neil was singing
about love again. 

"And you really made my day With the little things you say Right now I'm
looking through the window at a silhouette Trying to find something I 
can find yet Imagination is my best friend" 

Listening to the lyrics made her want to meet him now. So she asked, do
you want to have dinner tonight? Sitting back, she realized how lonely 
she had become. She has always felt good about her life, good friends, 
work she was passionate about, a great place to live, but she felt a 
void. These feelings left her uneasy and confused, feeling her emotions 
too close to the surface. Her chest felt heavy and she was having 
difficulty breathing. She did not feel in control of herself and did 
not like it. 

Over to the window she strolled slowly, staring outside leaning into the
window with her face pressed upon the cool glass. The street was full 
of life and energy, yet she felt like a spectator. Outside was life and 
all of its promise, inside she had lost something important but had 
been unable to recognize its importance until now. It distressed her to 
realize this. Never had this feeling come over her before. 

He didn't know what to do. She wanted to meet for dinner. Tonight! His
first reaction was absolutely, let's get together. Then some doubts 
penetrated his thoughts. His stomach was aching and he noticed some 
sweat on his brow. Why did a simple question cause such internal 
turmoil? Her first emails were amazing, so expressive and warm. The way 
she described how often her sense of humor had gotten her in trouble 
and how hard it was for her to get to places on time. She talked about 
her sisters and brothers and how she missed them since moving from the 
East Coast.  He laughed at her humor and was surprised at her openness 
when discussing her sexual preferences. He knew from her description 
she was beautiful. He found himself reading the email repeatedly. 

Then he read the second message and started to feel weird. Until then,
he wanted to see her as quickly as possible. Why then hesitate? Was his 
insecurity causing the emotional conflict? Although he had been with 
many women, the way they met always followed a specific pattern. First 
a physical attraction. He was a good flirt so he could usually have fun 
with the woman and normally it would lead somewhere. This was 
different; they had connected in a purely emotional and intellectual 
way. Would she be attracted to him or not. His chest ached. 

Once more, he read all of her previous messages hanging on to each word.
He wondered about her voice as he turned to look up at the clock. It 
was 5PM. If they were going to go out, he needed to decide now. He took 
a deep breath and starting typing. 

It's 5:15 she said to herself. He is probably already out, maybe with
another woman who had seen his ad. She poured some wine and walked over 
to the computer. She felt herself hoping he said yes while logging in, 
but felt uncertain and concerned. There was a single message. The 
subject said it all. Let's have dinner. 

Thom suggested they meet at a restaurant she knew. He said he had made a
reservation under his name at 8:00. Hmm...action oriented she thought. 
She liked that. She quickly finished her glass of wine. She had two 
hours to get ready. How thoughtful he was. She had told him how hard it 
was for her to get to places on time. He had given her enough time to 
feel as she didn't need to rush. She replied to his note. I will see 
you there.... I will be the one smiling. 

It was about 6:30 when he checked his email, sat back and smiled.
Immediately Thom started feeling nervous again. He felt as if his 
emotions were bouncing off each one of his internal organs and wasn't 
even sure he could get up and walk. Just a date he kept telling 
himself. He decided to get ready and walk to the restaurant. It would 
take about 35 minutes for him to get there and the walk would help calm 
him down. Feeling both nervous and excited, it was hard to focus on 
anything. He put on some jeans and a wool sweater, walked over to a 
mirror and smiled. The gray brought out the blue in his eyes. "She will 
like me, she will like me," he repeated to himself. He got on his shoes 
and left, wondering. 

Liz felt better now a decision had been made. Standing at her window
watching people move up and down her block, thinking about him. His 
words and thoughts felt right and he seemed open and honest. "What did 
he look like and would it matter?" she wondered. Turning away from her 
window and walking towards her bedroom, she decided to arrive at 8. 
That way he would be waiting. 

At 7:30 as finished her wine and left. She made a silent toast to the
promise of love. She went down stairs, hailed a cab and was on her way. 
 Liz stared outside as the cab drove towards the restaurant, watching 
couples walk together, she smiled hoping the path ahead led towards 
happiness. 


Tweet