When I’m beside Myself, I’m in Bad Company (standard:humor, 906 words)
Author: Godspenman	Added: Mar 18 2018	Views/Reads: 1806/1256	Story vote: 0.00 (0 votes)
Sometimes, what my hand “findeth to do” is not the right thing to do and gets me into trouble.

Click here to read the first 75 lines of the story

something and you have to interpret it and most of the time we husbands 
get it wrong. I know I do. 

I did what any sane husband would do under the circumstances. I got a
quarter out and did the “heads or tails” movement. Heads it was from 
the top down, tails it was from the bottom up. It turned out to be 
heads, which was the right way to go unbeknownst to me. 

I did not quite know how to read that little button and so I turned it
all the way and then put my pizza in to warm it up. 

Only a few moments later I began to smell an aroma. It was not the aroma
of pizza being warmed up, but rather the aroma of something on fire. 

I ran to the kitchen and to the oven and there my pizza was sizzling and
burning. I opened the door, pulled the pizza out and looked at it for a 
few moments. As much as I can remember, this is not the kind of pizza 
the wife does. What do I do with this burnt pizza? 

When the wife came home later that afternoon, she asked me how the pizza
was. I assured her that it was rather delicious. 

“Why then,” she said rather sternly, “is there burnt pizza in the
garbage?” 

My little slip reminded me of what Solomon said. “Whatsoever thy hand
findeth to do, do it with thy might; for there is no work, nor device, 
nor knowledge, nor wisdom, in the grave, whither thou goest” 
(Ecclesiastes 9:10). 

Sometimes, what my hand “findeth to do” is not the right thing to do and
gets me into trouble.


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