Kristina (standard:poetry, 567 words)
Author: Nathan Scot Taylor	Added: Sep 20 2003	Views/Reads: 3305/2114	Story vote: 0.00 (0 votes)
Alot like the rest of my work, me eating my heart out over a woman who couldn't care less about me. . . .

Click here to read the first 75 lines of the story


You reminded me that I wasn't quite dead. 

And for a while- 

I remembered what it was like to feel alive. 

You have to feel the cold to appreciate the warmth. 

Know lonelieness and despair- 

Before you can learn how gentle and soft a touch can be. 

You think you know it before 

But you don't. 

And that's what you gave me, 

if only for a while. 

I doubt you'll ever understand how much I value that. 

Again - I think you'd have to be me. 

Well, I did tell you I was a narcassistic fuck. 

There's so much I wish I could've known about you. 

So much I never got to learn. 

There's a coldness in me. 

A certainess of ice settles inside of me. 

I got a sickening feeling, its that part of me you were meant to take
up. 

Late at night, I find I wish for alot of things. 

Its strange to know I'll have a regret before it happens. 

I'm going to regret not knowing you so much. 

Probably until I find the one I'm supposed to find. 

If I'm lucky enough to find her. 

The smart money says she's going to be alot like you. 

God, do I wish. 

Wish things were different. 

But I just get the memories from you. 

I'm too damaged for you to understand this completely. 

I try my best to hide it. 

But it finds its way out, eventually. 

Like words you can't keep to yourself. 

Things you simply have to say. 

I don't want this to hurt you. 

I don't want you to feel sad, or guilty, or embarrassed- by what I'm
telling you. 

I know you probably will. 

I just had to tell you how special you were to me - before I go. 

I wish I could show you the way you make my heart feel 

I wish I could show you how much stronger I am - for knowing you. 

How sorry I am for not getting to know more.


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